All Comments on 'His Daddy's Car'

Long and worth the read. Tells a complete story. Good job

I enjoyed it - it flowed well and the characters were great -.

Thanks for sharing.

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story. Easily worth 5 stars.

What a great story please continue sharing your stories

I want to thank everyone for their comments. I realize that there are still several punctuation and grammatical errors within this submission, so your tolerance of these is commendable.

My next submission will be delayed while I search for a volunteer editor to hopefully help me proofread to avoid many of the same errors found in this story when initially submitted. The work is completed, with the exception of the fine editing.

Please let me know your preference on how it gets posted. I could submit it as a single story, as I did with this one, or break it up with separate submissions by chapter (8 chapters).

It is another novel, of approximately the same length as this one (~52,000 words). Some of the characters are the same, but the story is more lighthearted.

A wonderful story. I'll be waiting to see your next!

but it took 3 days, please break it up a little next time! and I hope there will be a next time!!

Good story but seriously troubled by the sadistic episodes. Completely unnecessary and harmful. I know the U.S. has proved to be a sadistic captor, but please don't rub our faces in it!!!!

Throughly enjoyed the story.

understanding the vallue of a clearance helps moving thgrough the mob cleaning.

I wish it wuld be that easy to clean out the rif raf plaguiing our country.

Intersting transitions from cloistered living to real world.

Well Done! I am looking forward to the next entry in this series. IMHO, I prefer the entry all at once instead of in Chapter form. Thank you again for such a wonderful story and such great characters.

Stretches the imagination somewhat and a bit Machiavellian but the results...well, perhaps the ends did justify the means considering who was being dealt with; it is fiction after all.

I'm a big fan of complete stories rather than submitted chapters so that people can

read at their own pace. I don't like waiting days between postings of a good story.

I look forward to your next effort.

really enjoyed this one, keep up the good work

Great story. Thank you for sharing with us.

Can we have more stories from bobbybrandt

Really good read. I hope you have other stories planned for the near future.

A very enjoyable story. The length of a good story does not bother me. If it is good, I don't want it to end. My personal preference is a story in chapters, but I don't mind it all at once.

I wish that we could really treat the bad guys this way, it would stop a lot of crime and terrorism. Our present system is more concerned with the criminals and terrorists than the victims. If they want to live outside the law, the law should not be used to protect them. I have zero sympathy for them.

Thank You for writing and I am looking forward to more.

I realized upon reading this great and lengthy story, that I have taken advantage of you, and for that I apologize. I just never thought that you like most readers have a day job and probably loved ones that you have sacrificed time with to give us this great story. I just wanted to say thank you for giving so much of yourself for our enjoyment. It adds a whole other level of appreciation for the stories I read on here. Again great story and thanks.

Sincerely and respectfully, Rob

Bobby is a bit of a Mary Sue character, but it was still a fun read.

I truly appreciate the comments and support that the readers on Literotica have shared with me.

To those who have asked about other stories, I can tell them that there are others - just not on Literotica. I find the submission process here ambiguous, especially where chapter submissions of a book is concerned, and have been hesitant to fight the fight required to get my work posted.

If I can find the time to format additional stories in a manner acceptable to this site, I will do so. The alternative is to post complete books in a single file as I did with this one.

and a very enjoyable read.

The details of torture and justification were a bit over the top. Mutilating and maiming your captives and sending them back in bits and pieces to "shock and awe" the recipients as a tactic has been done for centuries and there is no real evidence that it works. For that matter acting as "consultants" puts Bobby and his Merry Men outside the law. Desperate times need desperate measures, but....

However, this is a minor quibble and I look forward to more offerings from you. Breaking the story into chapters may help provided they are all published simultaneously. Like many others, once I get immersed in a story I can't wait for the next instalment.

This is a wonderful Story. I personally would have chosen Bach Salon in Dallas over Kubes in Ft Worth, but that is a matter of choice.

Could not stop reading once I started now finally finished at 3:00am...loved it!

Thank you for this one. I found it to be a thoroughly enjoyable story with excellent character development and story line. Well written literate style. I like the story being submitted at one time rather than chapter by chapter. Only a few minor quibbles with punctuation and terminology (i.e. .50 caliber machine gun instead of 50mm machine gun). Well worth 5* rating.

From one moment to the next, and without a visible transition, he can shift from new dad and horny young man to stone cold enforcer with skills to take out the lowest of the low with extreme prejudice.

and they sure seem to put JR to bed early. family dinner, short discussion about the book, and it's time for bed.

Wonderful story. Hit every button from adventure to romance, plus a bit of great parenting advice to boot.

Of course it did not hurt that my first car out of college was a '65 Corvair Monza convertible, though Evening Orchid rather than red. That was a fun car!

Wonderful story. I couldn't put it down.

There are only two In-N-Out Burgers in San Antonio TX, both on the north, but still you would think she having lived there nearly ten years would have noticed them.

I have rarely read any story as absorbing as this. Well done, and congrats on good writing.

about a person who is Not

a millionaire

clandestine military special ops security officer

computer genius

with extraordinary body parts

who has multiple black belts in obscure martial arts

followed by cliché after cliché after cliché

wistfully hoping

There's nothing better than this story on Lit. Hoping there's more to come.

You had me at "Red 65 Corvair Monza Convertible"....my first car, 22 years ago. Thank you for the memories....

It still holds a lot if wonderful memories for my father and I, and I am 60.

Great story.

Considering the length of this story, I found surprisingly few errors that stood out. There was the use of "shutter" instead of "shudder" in there, but the author is obviously has excellent writing skills. It was a heartwarming romantic story for the most part, but wasn't realistic. My comments might seem like I didn't like the story and that isn't true. It is because of my respect for the author's ability that I am taking the time to give my honest appraisal.

The good guys were perfect and the bad guys were simply evil and nobody's character had any nuance to them. There was no conflict that felt threatening on either the physical or emotional levels. One thing that bothered me was how the story switched so easily from happy family time to justifying sadistic mutilation. It is simply wishful thinking to assume that people in power will always employ unlimited and unchecked power responsibly.

The problem with that wishful thinking is that you have to rely on whomever is in charge to be responsible and always right in whom they get to destroy. People aren't perfect in real life and those imperfections mean that mistakes will happen. When you employ the drastic measures that are described so casually in this story, you can't undo those mistakes. Think of how many inmates have been released from serving time after new evidence exonerated them. Those people went to jail for something someone else did, after a trial where they could fully exercise their rights. Now take those rights away and imagine how many people would be unjustly dealt with.

If you can find the perfect people to administer this kind of justice, then I would consider endorsing it. Those perfect people don't exist in real life. That's why I can't totally enjoy stories where the characters are so unbelievable. These perfect people can make for good stories, but not great ones.

You refer to the machine gun on the helicopter as a 50mm gun. It would actually be a 50 caliber machine gun. The 50mm would be considered a cannon. The cannon on the A-10 Warthog is only 30mm and kills tanks. Sorry to be so critical but it chaps my ass when military info is identified incorrectly. I guess 23 years wearing the uniform tends to slant my opinion.

I found myself skip reading for about the last ten pages as I was beginning to wonder if this story would ever end. Also this is the second time I have read this yarn. It is when all is said and done a well written and entertaining story.

Never use five words or 8 paragraphs were one word or one sentence will do. Readers have imaginations, you don't need to tell them every detail, nor repeat from character 3 what character 1 and 2 have already said and done. Just tedious and detracts from the core dramatic and entertainment value.

Hope you keep writing, but better.

That being said I gave this 5* in every chapter. I'll read more of your writings.

Hit 4 stars by accident. You deserved 10.

I'm a big strong manly man and this brought tears to my eyes many time. A great love story.

I enjoyed it very much but I did have a couple of small problems with it. First off, it was just a bit too long for me. Too many unnecessary details that just dragged the story down. Of course that’s just a personal preference, not anyone’s problem but mine. Second, and even more important, I’ve had both and I’ll take a Whataburger over an “In And Out” anything, every day of the week and twice on Sunday. I know that’s a personal preference too but I’ll stand by that opinion.

Bobby would have helped JR restore his own car so he would value it more.

I re-read this in anticipation of reading "Change" and really enjoyed it!

These have to be the most boring 27 pages on Literotica, I've ever read. It's clear from page 2 on that the two will end up together. All problems and dangers are solved with a swipe of the hand of this now super rich and influential former soldier with infinite resources.

There's no surprise, no tension, no emotion, no eroticism, no anything.

I gave two stars for mostly correct spelling and grammar.

I find it interesting that some people spend days being bored and complain

Very good job with this story. Keep up the good work.

Paps

Yes it maybe a little long on words and details

But it's still a good yarn.

Cheers

Every story worth writing is replete with details. The details is where life is lived and love is shared. There is much more than getting up in the morning, eating, going to work, lunch, more work then home for supper, sex then sleep. There are no details there. THAT is boring.

What the boring commentator misses is the massive amount of factual details in this story, but I digress.

Very well done BB!

Wordcraft

Quite an epic read. Broken down to a few chapters would have worked better but that said, I really loved it. Thank you for all your hard work.

Francis is masculine; Frances is feminine.

This story reminds me of the 1st time I read a Tom Clancy novel. Lots of near real tactics and equipment. If only this could actually happen - I'm talking about the ability & desire of our government to fix international criminality in real life! Was a long read but worth it! Can't wait to read the follow-ups in your archive.

Enjoyed every bit of it...

Would like to imitate the fatherly role portrayed in this series,when I finally become a father...

Thumbs up...Keep 'em coming.

....Godian....

So long and so worth it. Thank You!

After 9/11, I was talking, in full rage, with an American friend over IRS. In our chat, I was suggesting some explicit stuff that I would do to break Islamic combatants (female guards being one, sneak feeding pork another, and generally PSY warfare stuff. Few years after when Black sites were revealed and the Muslim prisoners' treatment also, I was shocked and FUBARed because they had done everything my angrily sick mind had devised as if I had written the manual. Since then I watch very carefully what I allow to be seen online...

Still, I loved the story of the Brandt's saga and will continue reading the sequels!

Seems i need to go research Russian Mafia

Just finished reading....that makes 3 times

Wow, what a story, started out as a mushy romantic story then turned into a mystery story, then back to romantic and Segway into spires and terrorism and back to romantic, yes very epic.

I got bored with this story halfway through, and mainly because of this bad pattern:

Something happens and it's told in, let's say, 4 paragraphs.

Later X reminisces about it and it's told again in 4 paragraphs.

Later it's told from the point of view of Y: another 4 paragraphs.

Later X tells Z about it: 6 paragraphs this time, because it's a conversation.

And so on. The story could have been 2/3 shorter if not for the constant repetitions.

Probably my all time favorite here. Gotta say though. My first car in high school was a used 63 corvair monza Ralph Nader got it right. That car was in a constant state of imminent breakdown. Worst bucket of junk I ever owned. Gotta say there Bobby either you are writing this one with your tongue firmly in cheek to quell your guffaws or you are a satisfied consumer of State mental health services. LMOL

Excellent story. Looking forward to the 2nd and 4th stories. Thank-you

Absolute corker, one of the longest “all in one hit” stories I’ve read here on Lit, and it didn’t disappoint, the occasional error, plus I’d have liked a bit more detail on the peripheral characters towards the end, but if wishes were horses…. 5 stars because I thoroughly enjoyed it, plus it was a wide ranging story over a decade or more with a happy ever after, which let’s be honest is what we’re looking for in a romance. Many thanks for writing and posting, cheers Ppfzz.

Great story, and a fine intro to the Brandt family. One thing - you do not order a double double with cheese at In-N-out. The double double is two hamburger patties and two slices of cheese. If you want less cheese you order a double single, or if you are a real glutton, you order a triple triple. There are pictures on the internet a 100/100 that was ordered once. 100 patties and 100 slices of cheese. Over 19000 calories.

LOL, ridiculous story of a superhero ninja who never has to worry about not succeeding because he is the secretly Chuck Norris. Liked the idea of reclaiming a lost love, rest of it was pure fantasy.

not quite done it yet but its great i enjoyed it so much that I had to hop on my computer to rate it because APP gets errors when rating

Just Spectacular. This would make an awesome movie.

I loved this story from beginning to end.

Just beautiful. I wanted it to never end. The scene when she fainted gave me goosebumps. I had no idea that Bobby was going to be such a BAMF. I loved every page. I can't wait to start the second installment of the Bobby Brandt!

Great story. Bravos.

I loved the story. It had young love, loss, passion, giving and caring plus some suspense. What more could a guy ask for? Keep up the good work and I’m looking forward to reading lol your stories. MtM

Loved all the Bobby Brandt stories. Can we please have some more action stories Please

Rereading it again after a couple of years. Your stuff just gets better and better. It’s like fine wine in which the various flavors mature over time

5 stars again

Keep um coming plz.. hope your not retiring from writing here.. it's hard to find good story tellers now. So many have stopped and left for greener pastures.. or to enjoy the scenery.. any way Thank You for YOUR story's would Love to read More from you.. but if not.. well best wishes.. 🤷👁️👁️🙄🤔😜👍👍🍻

I have read all the Bobby's car stories at least 5 times. Utter enjoyment. I'm probably going to read them 5 more times before they pull the plug.

Odessa is in Ukraine not Russia. And doing what you described to Muslims would not intimidate them, it would infuriate them and likely lead to the deaths of many Americans.

Just re-read it and it is still awesome! I feel like I just took a vacation! 5/5

Great story I have just found.

It is a crying shame that the sort of shock and awe justice cannot be practised due to the pussy politicians that pander to every woke minority these days. The world would be a better place for it.

Really hard to believe that Katie would remain unaware of Franc's little brother and her maiden name. Finding background info about one's close friends is just natural.

Splendid story, thoroughly satisfying and enjoyable. I like a long story when it's well written.

I don't know how many times I have read this whole series including the satellite stories. I think it has to be eight or nine times. Yes there are minor mistakes but overall the stories are well written and compel me to revisit them. Please don't totally abandon the series.

My wife lived close to Leon Valley for ten years and have so many fond memories from their. I can visualize Pattycat studying the paintings at the McNay or painting any of the festive scenes scenes from the river walk. Either you carefully research the area or lived there... The story is excellently executed and I look forward to reading the rest.

Enjoyable story. But horrifying torture doesn’t actually work very well as a deterrent. Ask both the Israelis and the Palestinians. It plays well with certain parts of the home crowd, but doesn’t achieve your objective (except in fiction).

Started promising but turned into utter crap with all the violence and torture. Also, author tagged for romance but not for torture and mutilation, which also feature prominently. In fact there is no warning about it. I am also getting quite tired of all "romance" stories where one of the partners has to be either special operative, wealthy, a ninja, or have a massive dick to end all dicks, or all of it, in order to be special enough to have a romance. I personally consider that to be a writer's flaw indicating they aren't able to convincingly write about a normal relationship without requiring some special circumstances to ship it.

Disappointing.