All Comments on 'There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 06'

OMG I really love this story. The dialogue between the various characters keeps me smiling or even cracking out aloud.

Keep writing.

To ANNONYMOUS, I finally realized what you wanted me to do. I will no longer delete any of the comments submitted to me by my readers, Bob

A storyline I never tire of reading...enjoy the sublime nature...anticipating the next chapter...hope to doing so for many more!

Hello Prolonged_Debut10, concerning your concern with changing the category. What you could do is name it: There must be a Mistake: Part 2, or some such ;).

They probably don't mind it then...

Greetings, R2

PS. Really like this story alot, a joy to read.

I have enjoyed all your writings and you incorporating them together I know will become an even better tale. I know that you have released the last few a little quicker than you have before and that is wonderful put the proof reading has fallen a little and little things have gotten past that you would not have let slip before.

I do hope that your other writings are doing well and I hope to be able to purchase them soon so please keep us informed. I do hope that you keep up with all your great writing and entwine the stories even more.

I will keep looking for your works as I have done for a long while now.

Sincerely your Fan

Cinnamon_Spice

Sorry, almost every main character except Rod and the children seem unlikeable at best. Even Jennifer uses emotional black mail and becomes unlikable. Intellectual condescension, mental and physically abuse, all wrapped in impressive emotional immaturity. Maybe this should be under the science fiction category where these characters are the aliens trying to mimic humans. I certainly found few to love or even like.

Dear Anonymous, really you made it to chapter 6 of a story that averages 6+ pages per chapter and just now discovered you don't like the characters. I personally know within a few paragraphs if it is something I want to read or not.

The only thing wrong with changing the category is that the story would then appear under that category and people looking for it under Novels and Novellas wouldn't see any updates although I believe it would still register under the Also In This Series at the right.

I have enjoyed reading your story! Some parts of it made me laugh so much I had tears running down my face! Especially when Gordon set up Rod by rolling up his pant cuff. I LMAO!

Your story has been very entertaining. Thank you for sharing it with us!

... of a story that takes on it's own life. The good ones are that way. My first 'little' outline took five chapters to bring it to what I thought was a conclusion, and the readers got me to do sixteen more to finish it to their satisfaction.

Do yourself a favor though, find an editor / proof reader. The difference in my first series to the second is amazing to even me, and it is all due to his input.

How you end it will be interesting.

Acup

For being an anonymous nonentity I have surely made some inroads here and with another author as well. That was not my intention but, whatever happens does so for a reason, I guess, or so they say...

I have loved every chapter of this story so far and I am sure to stay with it for as long as it lasts (should the quality maintain, of course). I personally like the banter between characters and appreciate the put-downs--intelligent creatures need to learn and appreciate a semblance of humility. Plus, trying to respond accordingly can keep the mind active and also helps with fitting in with those around you. Not only that but some of the comments are downright hilarious and I find myself laughing out loud at very inopportune times.

I'm glad you have decided not to remove any more comments in the future. For posterity's sake I feel they need to be there. Newcomers need a sense of what has gone before, if nothing else than to give them an idea of what they may or may not want to add that might just cause something new to appear out of nowhere. Perhaps I am being overly-optimistic...

Yes, there are still some blatant punctuation and spelling errors and a proof-reader would be a great idea. But don't let that deter you from still putting out the best read that you can. Nothing is perfect, no matter how high you strive.

Roger.

I wish i was knowledgeable to offer to do editing for you, but at the age of 71 I am not that great at interpreting how to do the correcting on a computer.

And really, when i find one, i chalk it up to my side for finding it.

Thanks for the story.

Tom

...but only because of a desire to know what happens.

Your writing is truly, truly appalling - to the point that reading is almost physically painful.

As has been noted previously, your dialogue is so overwritten it's beyond... well, it's beyond anything, really.

And the thing with the "swear jar" is truly childish and pathetic.

I won't go on, or I'm afraid I may become abusive. I sincerely hope you connect with your anonymous editor, because there are, honestly, very few stories on here that need it more!

(Oh, and that "book deal" you alluded to a while back? I think they may have been pulling your leg)

Jennifer laughed. "You are teaching my son had a gamble at the age of four?"

This is A great idea but your fucking writing is about Pre school level

are named after the city they were invented in. Buffalo, NY. Great story,enjoying the read. Thanks

Intentional, or otherwise, you made reference to a condition involved with actually manipulating space time relationships. Of which later in your story you could apply to your propulsion system. Kudos

Your story line is good but I'm afraid I can only give you three stars because of the number of mistakes you make. Things like there for their and others, plus missing words that make the sentence or phrase wrong. A good editor or just a simple proof reader will solve the problem.

If you haven't got one yet I would be happy to help.

You definitely need a proof reader! Delicious has the capital dropped several times, that is the worst mistake in this chapter. I hope the rest of the story is as good. As it is a mix and is an enjoyable read.

Oh this is so fun. Good story.

This story has all the combative charm of Top Chef. BTW, those with doctorate degrees rarely call each other “doctor,” only those who treat illness are given that honorific. Have never heard a really intelligent person discuss their IQ; although a few assholes did mention MENSA membership, or the question they missed on the SAT. Even throws his weight and money around too much to be tolerable; he would attract a beautiful women about as well as DDT attracts ants. Maybe he should do what Trump does and just grab them by the pussy; as famous as he is, it might work.

Why didn't Even as vengeance on his father have Rod form a shell company and buy the company his father worked for and reorganize the company so that part of the company did paper and the part his father worked in worked R&D recycling toilet paper with only his father and his son-in-law worked there, force them both in an early grave before he inherited Delicious? It would have been apropos for him to end his father's future by killing his job. It would have been easy to also rub his father's nose into the ground by appearing one day in a suit and tie as the owner on an inspection tour and "not recognize" his father.

I enjoy reading your stories up to now and I can’t wait to read more. Despite some of the other negative reviews, which some is pretty hilarious, I must thank you for sharing your stories. Please don’t stop writing and don’t get disappointed by some of the other people. There are many more that don’t comment and simply enjoy your writings.

Stopped reading at the beginning of this chapter. Originally never thought i would say this, but it becomes boring!

You seemingly can't stop adding sideplots to the main story. If they're compelling that might be a good thing, but they're not near compelling enough, to me anyway.

The banter is starting to get old, too, as is the super rich behaviour, and all the stuff that conveniently appears out of the magic hat whenever the story or the protagonists have any use for it. That's kinda cheap.

The typo's are so inane, it becomes embarassing. Many resemble voice-to-text errors.

Five and four stars for previous chapters, three for this one, the obvious involvement in producing the story notwithstanding.

Loved the genius girl protagonist angle.

Loved the adult male virgin angle.

Loved a lot of angles, seriously.

However, the repetitiveness is a bitch, jokes don't keep very well.

Quite nice for this site's purposes, but any publisher will probably tell you to publish your work independently.

Tx for the entertainment & gtz

I'm so glad that this isn't a short story as I've thoroughly enjoyed the journey.

I'm looking forward to the next adventure with these characters.

As I said at the end of Chapter one, the add on bits are not making the story tight. I really do not understand where Gordon got his IQ from and I find it very hard to believe he would have it 'just like that'. Either make out his father had that sort of mental capacity as it could not have come from his mothers side. Thus I feel it is a bolt on to the story that is just not working for me. Further Delicious is not 18 yet so why is there talk of all this sex going on. When she is 18 she is an adult and Even will have no or little say in what she does. Even has a right to be worried about her at this point. Thus the points above for me, mar this good story.

With the revelation of Divine this short story has come to its end. It is disheartening to see that you wrote another 26 chapters.