All Comments on 'My Collars'

I liked this because it was thought provoking, challenges the standard line about ownership and it is from the female point of view. Well thought, well written. 5*

At last somebody here seems to 'get it', how often do I frustratingly and depressed with the stories, 'plough through' story after BDSM story, looking for the one that expresses the love between dom/sub, master/slave, and as said, its very depressing that I would say 90% of these stories are all about the punishment and pain that he can dish out to her, unfortunately a lot of the stories the 'plot' ranges from being just plain silly to the absurd, with no reality. The doms and masters are all about how much they can 'take' from her and not give anything in return. How is it that these story master/doms have a sub screaming in pain and not have a shred of humanity? As for any caring, affection or dare I say it LOVE in these stories, forget it. I would say that there are some very good authors here that do 'get it', but I think I could count there numbers on the fingers of my hands. Thank you Tara_Neale.

the first step is neither the longest or the hardest, TK U MLJ LV NV

how far should Hypocrisy rule your actions TK U MLJ LV NV

As someone with the same idealistic views about ownership, who wants to make her own collar, having worn none, this appealed to me in spite of not being what I come to this site for (which is fictional happy stories).

Today I came to this site not to be turned on, but because I wanted to see something different. The first story I found was too unrealistic to me, and this was the second one I chose. I was honestly waiting for the part where that one master came and the part where it described in detail how he dominated her, but this was much nicer. Now I'm gonna go somewhere else to find a more meaningful BDSM story, but this was very nice. I shared the same opinion as the narrator.

Thank you for your thoughts and experiences. The term ownership (over someone collared) is well-used and acted upon - but an unfortunate one. As you say, it creates (or unleashes) the mindset of Mine, Mine, Mine.... A healthier worldview would be to look at collaring as stewardship over that person. An (old fashioned) term that in practice should make the well-being of the collared the first priority, rather than the selfish desires of the dom/master/mistress. So even though the collared person is giving themselves to their dom/master/mistress, it should be with the understanding that in their submission, their well-being (physically, sexually, emotionally, mentally) will be the first priority of the dom. [Yes - I know it is idealistic, but I am wearing my rose coloured reading glasses tonight!]

Reaffirming inside to read from the voice of experience what my cynical mind always insists is true, there is an idealistic view and a realistic view...seldom are the two in line. True love is rare no matter the lifestyle and all relationships come with heartache. I'mnot saying 'don't love', but rather be honest with yourself about your love and what it really means.

Thank you so much for writing this.

I've just read this and I find it fascinating on a couple of levels. One is that there never is a "real" sense of slavery in bdsm because it's basically illegal in every meaning of the word in a modern sense. A person can never be "owned" in a literal sense because bdsm is all about "consensual sex" so if you don't like something it just shouldn't happen or you could even just walk away which you could never do as a "real slave". This has often laid the accusation of "who has the real power in a bdsm relationship, the Master/Mistress, or the slave?".

Secondly, what we know about slavery is what OTHER people have told us. Though Antebellum Slavery was harsh slaves weren't just killed or starved to death like the way the Nazis did to their Jewish slaves in the Second World War or the way the Communists did to the White Russians after the Revolution. To Antebellum black slaves were more like farm animals and were worked hard to maximise profit also Antebellum slavery hasn't been the only harsh slavery throughout history, think Roman or Greek quarry slaves or even galley slaves, these are probably slaveries that nobody would be keen to try in reality.

The use of the word "slavery" has some real misunderstood connotations and is probably an unfortunate word to use in the bdsm sphere.

Your thoughts on what a collar means to you is a very smart observation in my view. Many slaves both in the old context and the new context come to see their collars as a more than a sign of ownership. Many see it as something that represents that they are of value to the owner, Dom, Top etc. something to be cherished and cared for so if a Dom etc doesn't know this and just sees it as a badge of ownership they probably shouldn't be a Dom in the first place. Think about a dog, you put a collar on to show who its owner is but you also love and care for it because that dog is now dependent on YOU for everything, food, shelter, vets etc. Well this is what a sub thinks when they gives everything to you and they trust you to do the right thing and not be selfish and think me, me, me.

Good observation, thank you.

S. x

Great

I liked this perspective but good Masters do exist.

Admittedly I spent 30yrs searching before finding mine but my kink needs a special kind of man 😉