by fanfare
...it almost makes me believe that you truly believe in the equality of the sexes, when your other rants make it clear that you really believe in female supremacy and a reverse double standard in favor of women. That being said, despite the poor paragraph and sentence structure typical of your ramblings, it is a fascinating tale of hypocrisy, the idle rich, the wimpiness of some milksop trust-fundies, and the inability of the title character to decide what the hell he really wants. Maddie really does come across as the only redeemable human being in this lot, even if the terms had some reasonable expectations (unless in contrast to a truly open marriage).
All in all, a likeable story, but the jury is still out on the author as a man.
great story, I know the people the girl deserves love and honor money be dammed.8d4c
more thoroughly that it wasn't the pre-nup idea itself that she took issue with, as much as how extremely unfair and unbalanced it was. Yes she made those points, but she expressed it more like she wouldn't accept a pre-nup in ANY form, for ANY reason. Her obvious distrust for his family would make you think that she would want HER OWN INTERESTS protected. hmm.
But then again, she DOES make the point that the marriage won't happen MORE because of his lack of maturity than anything relating to the pre-nup. Interesting that she came to this realization AFTER accepting Grandmother's ring.....
Congratultions on good descriptions for a couple of people who managed to avoid making perhaps the greatest mistake of their lives. It is clear that he would have been JUST as miserable with her, as she would have been with him.
Solid read, and thanks!
And she was a bigger snob than they were. An intellectual snob, but a snob none-the-less. The part of this story that didn't work for me was how they got to the point of being engaged. His issues would have been clear to her from the very start of their relationship. And her intellectual superior attitude would have been obvious to him. How did they ever get to a second date, let alone an engagement? I think you had a decent idea, but your poor writing ruined the overall story. Maybe next time.
I walked away from a relationship like that. The ex didn't think I knew about the cheating and lying. In reality, he wasn't good enough to marry into my family.
this was border line retarded, Your comment are as stupid as this fucking story.
It's about snobbery and a "caste system" based on old wealth and unearned wealth. It was good to see her enumerate qualities, qualifications, and realities that trump the presumption by the wealthy that they are all that.
The only thing I didn't understand is why she wasted any time or energy on the drunken layabout.
Fun to read. No betrayal. The writing, if stilted in places, was compelling enough to keep me interested. I wonder if the story would have been better served if the lout had not been the protagonist.
thanks
This wasn't a story. I don't know what it was.
One thing I do know. Trust your 1st instinct Fanfare. Go with your gut.
This belongs in the trash.
Delete , delete, ....lol
AMerryMan
with only this Bottle of Bourbon for comfort--even though I know she was right. TK U MLJ LV NV
and his loss, which to him is unfathomable--- is the Universes' Gain. TK U MLJ LV NV
I thought this one was quite funny. Loved the dialogue and the over-the-topness.
Loved it! Very well done. But, of course, one wonders how a really smart woman ever gave a doofus like Johnny the time of day.
With the lesson being, that life is difficult for those born rich....
She saw her man and her family for what they were, a bunch of insufferable snobs who don't deserve the time of day. And she took a powder. Smart girl. Great tale.
Five Stars
This as an old story, I had worked on over several years, left unfinished and then recently decided to finish off-as -is and post.
From what notes I left myself, this work was based on several different onepercenter scandals.
For those of you who did comprehend correctly, yes, this is a polemic against the American system defending and advocating Socialist corruption on behalf of the Wealthy and the crushing burden of pseudo-capitalist kleptocracy that burdens the rest of us.
Recently, another writer called our system an oligarchy and I had to argue she is wrong. We actually are a plutocracy.
An oligarchy is a meritocracy that accepts social responsibilities and civic duties.
That sure as fuck doesn't describe our present ruling class of bloated entitled degenerates.
As for being a man-hater, sorry to burst your bubble little boys, with my big prick. In stories such as this one, just gender reverse the dialogue.
Originally I tentatively wrote the protagonist, Maddie, as a male and Johnny as a woman of the Paris Hilton, celebrity/uselessness archetype.
However, being a sadistic bastard who enjoys tormenting you spelunkers, that switch was the only major change I made to this storyline.
And, for those of you who criticize my writing style, I piss on the grave of your dead religion of Academic English.
"When you finally grow up and become the mature man I mistakenly thought I was to marry. If you still have any interest in me as your wife. If you still bear me any love, John. And if you can forsake all others and cleave only unto me."
everdenchily yore tipe uv larnin dont like tu reed gude ritin.
Compared with most of the ignorant submittals posted in Lit, this is one of the most erudite stories it has been my pleasure to read.
fanfare, please submit more (and longer) stories.
Thank you,
de Jay
........ the DIAMOND from the coal.
Its good , though, for Maddie. Saved, from future heart ache.
Gave it a 5 , snobbishly. lol.
Well crafted, defined the aristocratic pompous "old school" money folks who don't do shit but think they must cover their public asses versus those cerebral, energetic folks who make, spend and invest their money through the generations. Doing so as effective, highly functional members of a society that flows with change in many, many environments. In this case Johnny fits nowhere and Maddie will most probably move into a position that pushes future as easy to work towards plus she'll marry well and look damn good doing it!!
BRAVO!!
great story. He's a retard and reads every one of these stories and then bitches about them. If he hates them the story is usually really good. eat shit annony you fucking retard
ALL of its garbage is an excrement of a diseased mind.
I mean, this shithead is so out of it that I am certain he cannot tie its shoes, and he licks his fellow inmates ass instead of using paper.
You have used the words parvenu and ephermal incorrectly. Maybe you should stop attempting to place obscure words into your stories. The rednecks who enjoy your stories won't understand them.
When she said "my family is creating the future"; I expected her to require Doofus to sign a pre-nup blocking him from HER (probable) future inheritance.
OUTSTANDING,,,,,,,, 5 stars. The nay Sayers are pissed because she is not a subservient wimp like them.
5 BIG STARS. Continue the good fight.