Nest Pt. I
by MorningStar ©
The letter came in the mail on a Monday afternoon. Neatly typed, my name and address stared starkly out from the legal looking envelope, Ms. Jessica Louise Hawthorne. I always hated my legal name. It sounded so stuffy and old fashioned and because of that very fact I suffered unmerciful torment as a child in school. I signed everything Jessie H. and tried to hide the name I was blessed with by unthinking parents who chose to honor their dead relatives. Hopefully one day I'd be able to change that last name, but up till now the prospects looked slim.
That was the only thing that looked slim on me. I was also genetically blessed to be a chubby child, who thankfully grew into, as they say, a well-endowed woman. As a child, suffering from glasses and fat cheeks that your grandmother loved to pinch, you don't think you'll ever become anything of beauty. I guess when you reach my age you have to call yourself a woman, even if inside you're still feel young and have an imagination that tends to carry you through a dull life. As for beauty, well that I wasn't too sure of. No man had ever really looked my way twice, at least not that I'd noticed.
Mamma used to tell me to get my nose out of the books and look at the world, but I was afraid to see if anyone was laughing at me for my short comings. My books let my mind wander freely to distant places with many men who called me lovely. It was that same imagination that took over as I picked up the envelope and turned it over, looking for a return address. There was none.
Well now, do I open it and read some dreadful news I don't want to hear or find out that I finally won some lottery somewhere. My luck, it's a well conceived ad campaign to get me to buy into some time share too far awhile to travel to. Coffee, that's what I need. Leave the unpleasantness till after I have the afternoon fix of caffeine. So I puttered in the kitchen and walked by the letter sitting there on the counter at least a dozen times, touching it once or twice, picking it up and then laying it back down.
Pouring steaming java into my favorite cup, throwing in a dash if Irish Cream for a touch of confidence, I finally picked up the letter opener and started to slit the top open when the phone rang. I nearly knocked the coffee over onto the envelope. Quick reflexes saved the official looking thing in time. I ran across the room to answer the phone before it stopped ringing. Probably my mother, she was the only one who ever called me.
"Is this Ms. Hawthorne?" a masculine voice asked quietly.
"I was asked to make sure you received your letter the mail today"
"Is it in a cream colored envelope without a return address?"
"Yes ma'am, that's the one. I take it you haven't read it yet then?"
"No, the phone rang when I was getting ready to. Why?"
"Well I won't disturb you any further this evening. Oh and finally, I was instructed to tell you, Nighthawk sends his regards."
"Wait a minute" I said as the other end of the line went dead in my ear. The only Nighthawk I knew off was someone I'd talked to in a chat room. He'd sort of become my mentor online, someone that listened to my life's story without falling asleep at the keyboard. Granted it took me several months to give him any details, but like water falling on a stone over time, he'd worn down the shell I had encased my feelings in and I'd learned that I was a human being with some worth. What had started as weekly conversations had turned into nightly chats for the most part. Of course occasionally we missed a night or two, but not often, and when we did, I felt hollow, empty.
I hadn't even begun to try and figure that part out. He seemed to pull more information out of me than I even knew about myself. I didn't even know for sure where he lived. It could have been half way around the world for all I knew. I just knew I liked the way he treated me, even with the differences in our ages. That was the only thing I knew for sure. He was older than I was by 15 years. I felt I was learning about life through his experiences. During the course of our time together, he'd helped me discover my sensual side. He let me express my dreams, my desires, my needs both mental and physical. I found that I wasn't a 'prude' like I'd been labeled all those years in school. I yet had to experience any relationship with a flesh and blood human being, but I was no longer without hopes that I could be a lover if given the chance. I just needed the chance. My curiosity was aroused when the gentleman on the phone mentioned Nighthawk's name. I hadn't told anyone about him. Where was that envelope?
Of course it was right where I'd left it on the counter. Being a bit fastidious about things, I carefully opened the envelope and removed a single sheet of embossed cream linen. Plain paper, no heading telling me who it was from, just a typed letter dated with Sunday's date.
I've always told you, you could trust me to never hurt you in word or deed, and I think over the past year, you've learned that truth for yourself. I've watched a woman blossom before me as we've spent the hours talking and sharing online. I've waited until I thought you were strong enough, brave enough and willing to take a leap of faith in me. All I ask is that you consider this carefully and I hope you'll agree. Go to your front window and look outside. You'll see a limo waiting there for you. You need not pack anything, I've made all the necessary arrangements for all your comforts. You deserve special treatment, you've waited far too long to be shown how special you are. This is my gift to you for all you've done for my heart. Please accept it. All you need to do is walk out to the car, the driver will deliver you to your retreat from the world. If you don't feel you can accept this mere token, I'll understand, but I pray you will grab hold of the strength you've found within yourself and chose to go.
My hands were trembling. My legs were shaking. What was this, some cruel joke? It couldn't be though. Nighthawk wasn't that kind of person. I slowly walked over to the front window and pulled back the curtain to peek outside. Sitting along the sidewalk was a stretch, white limo with a uniformed driver leaning against the front fender. When he saw the curtain move, he straightened his stance and nodded in my direction as he opened the passenger door.
Never in my life had I done anything on the spur of the moment. It was my style to study things from all angles and weigh all consequences. I stepped back from the window, turned to face my little world of a house I called home for the last 5 years and really looked at it. Nothing flamboyant, nothing that stood out for my attention. Nothing that required my immediate ministrations, no pets to take care of, no plants to water, absolutely no reason to not take this opportunity , so why was I hesitating? I called work and left a message that I was having to take care of some personal business for the next few days. I hadn't used any vacation time and work was slow at this time of year.
I called my mother and told her I was taking a little vacation along the coast, I'd call her when I got there. I walked to the closet and then remembered he said not to pack anything. I'd trusted him with all my secrets. I wasn't going to stop trusting him now. Grabbing my purse and house keys, I stepped through the front door, pulled it closed and locked it behind me. Never looking back, I straightened my shoulders and smiled at the chauffeur as he helped me into the back seat. Jessica Louise what are you doing?
To be continued...
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