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I'll read yours...

destinie21

destinie21

Daddy's Brat
Joined
May 27, 2003
Posts
3,612
I'd like to institute a read mine and I'll read yours thread.

Alot of the time I want feedback but i rarely give it to others.
At least not on SF If I like or dislike a story I send feedback via the lit email. However I find when people comment on my stories on SF I will comment if I see they are looking fo feedback as well.
So I'd like to open a thread where you read at least one story from the previous poster and comment. If you don't dig the theme and perfer not to read put that down in your post and comment on another author's story instead.
Also it you want feedback on a specific story put it in the a link so that the author after you will know what story to read. If you choose not to specify a story then put a link to all your stories in the content of your post and let the reader choose.


pS: Whoever posts after me will be able to pick a story here's a link to all of them so you can choose My stories


Also whoever posts after me will end up with two sets of feedback because I will comment on one of their stories as well although it will be via email so as not to mess up the thread.
 
Hi Destinie,
I read your story My Girl. I liked it very much, the descriptions and details were great. I was happy that you didn't get into the distracting mention of exact sizes as you described the girl, but gave us just enough detail to draw our own picture of how she looked. The only problem I had with the story is that it's too short. It left me wanting to know more about the night with the one night stand and with Karen. The one sex scene with Karen was packed with terrific detail and very sexy, but I wanted more. Maybe I was wanting too much:D . Anyway, I liked it a lot and would love a part 2.


Wicked:kiss:
 
Hi, I just read your story Reunion, it was wonderful. I will be reading more of your stories. I choose the Reunion one first because my only story here is about a Reunioun of sorts. Have a great day! sweet T I have a post here in the forum.. under Afternoon Delight. :kiss: http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=106562
 
Last edited:
Wicked-N-Erotic said:
Hi Destinie,
I read your story My Girl. I liked it very much, the descriptions and details were great. I was happy that you didn't get into the distracting mention of exact sizes as you described the girl, but gave us just enough detail to draw our own picture of how she looked. The only problem I had with the story is that it's too short. It left me wanting to know more about the night with the one night stand and with Karen. The one sex scene with Karen was packed with terrific detail and very sexy, but I wanted more. Maybe I was wanting too much:D . Anyway, I liked it a lot and would love a part 2.


Wicked:kiss:
Click to expand...

there is a part 2 of My girl
My girl 2
and to Sweet T I'm submitting other parts to reunion as well
 
I just read 2 stories and a poem

Hey, Wicked. I just read 2 of your stories and one of your poems. How could I resist "How To Fuck Me 101?" I sent you some feedback on the stories. Nice stuff, and cute pic on your story list, by the way.

flashlight7.5
 
Hello Flashlight7.5...

I read your story "Shadows in the Dark" and I was impressed with your use of dialogue and detail. A really nice read.

Well deserving of the "E.":)

Cookie:rose:
 
Sice it was the newest story I read Waiting for Nicholas.

I found it heartbreakingly romantic. The character development was great you managed to consolidate a whole life story into one (lit) page. Also I like the way you left out her appearances and kept his minimal this will allow each reader the luxry of putting in their own fantasy. Kudos.
 
Excellent Thread, Destinie...
This thread is what Literotica should be all about - Authors reading and commenting on the work of their peers.

Way to Go, Girl!

:rose: :rose: :rose:
 
Design House

I read this story last night. I was quite impressed, Destinie. The story is well set up from the beginning and builds to the sex scene in the boss's home at the end.

I love the way you left the ending open for a possible sequal too. That's something I do. It doesn't obligate you to write it, but does give you the option.

The characters were wonderful. You did a great job of defining each of their personalities. Too many stories on Lit define the personality of their characters with the "She had big tits, long blond hair and a nice ass" kind of physical description. Yours have life.

The only negative comment I could have about the story is the common punctuation error in your dialogue and an occasional missed capitalization.

I gave you a five ;)
 
Hey, Wicked. I just read 2 of your stories and one of your poems. How could I resist "How To Fuck Me 101?" I sent you some feedback on the stories. Nice stuff, and cute pic on your story list, by the way.
Click to expand...


Thank you, Flashlight, for reading and the praises. Glad you enjoyed more than one of my labors of love. Also glad you like the pic:) I hope to be getting to some of yours soon.



Destinie, Destinie, Destinie,

WOW, I loved "My Girl" parts one and two. I'm so glad you pointed out that part two was there. :D It made the story so much hotter. Thanks for such a great read.


Wicked:kiss:
 
thanks WNE and Jenny S for the feedback:D
(I know my editing bites ass on my own stories. I'm so glad for the SDC because the editing program never did pan out for me.I'll be trying to workshop there asap.)

Jenny I read your story old navy fantasy. I loved it. Your sense of humor cracks me up. Also I also have a few department store fantasies :) .

I especially enjoyed the ending most would have just let them walk out of the store through the front w/o getting caught. Even though these stories are fantasy I do like a little plausibility.
 
sweet T said:
Hi, I just read your story Reunion, it was wonderful. I will be reading more of your stories. I choose the Reunion one first because my only story here is about a Reunioun of sorts. Have a great day! sweet T I have a post here in the forum.. under Afternoon Delight. :kiss: http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=106562
Click to expand...


I did read your story and I belive I sent an email response. Since I can't remember I'll post some feedback here. I generally shy away from stories w/ IR as a theme because the tend to contain horrible stereo types however I read your story and I was pleasantly surprised. Your story was romantic and didn't dwell on the ethnic difference. Nor did I see any stereo types If more people wrote IR stories like yours I would definately be a fan.:)

ps: I'm trying to keep up with this thread so I've read most of the posters stories. If you notice anyone who commented and didn't recive feedback within 48 hrs please take it upon yourself to read one of their stories or pm me and let me know someone was overlooked.:)
 
Ty destinie for the nice feedback on my story...


I read "Design House" and I liked the build-up. The pacing was good and characterization was great too.

A few punctuation errors but I enjoyed it thoroughly.:rose:
 
Awww

destinie21 said:
thanks WNE and Jenny S for the feedback:D
(I know my editing bites ass on my own stories. I'm so glad for the SDC because the editing program never did pan out for me.I'll be trying to workshop there asap.)

Jenny I read your story old navy fantasy. I loved it. Your sense of humor cracks me up. Also I also have a few department store fantasies :) .

I especially enjoyed the ending most would have just let them walk out of the store through the front w/o getting caught. Even though these stories are fantasy I do like a little plausibility.
Click to expand...

Thank you, Destinie
You are so sweet. But I have to say, I am so jealous of your style :(
 
Electronic Sex

Hi Jenny,

Thankyou for the giggles as I read your story. You definitely exposed the chat room bull and crassness within one lit page. You don't need Destinie's style, you definitely have your own!

As I read, I noticed the obvious typos in the chat script and that made your story realistic and insightful. You grabbed the psychology of the juvenile cybersex geek right out of some WellHungStud's chat profile when you created KnotyNutz and I had to laugh at his obvious excitement when his friend "got some". Too funny.

Where's the dumpster with the 'puter in it? I could use an upgrade.
 
Re: Electronic Sex

champagne1982 said:
Hi Jenny,

Thankyou for the giggles as I read your story. You definitely exposed the chat room bull and crassness within one lit page. You don't need Destinie's style, you definitely have your own!

As I read, I noticed the obvious typos in the chat script and that made your story realistic and insightful. You grabbed the psychology of the juvenile cybersex geek right out of some WellHungStud's chat profile when you created KnotyNutz and I had to laugh at his obvious excitement when his friend "got some". Too funny.

Where's the dumpster with the 'puter in it? I could use an upgrade.
Click to expand...

LMAO.
That was a story I started several years ago and never really quite finished until last spring. For some reason it's done quite well. I couldn't tell you way.

I so appreciate the encouragement, champagne. :heart: :rose: :heart:
 
C1982 I read why mormons don't dance and I thoughit was very well done. I like poetry but alot of times things on the lit really aren't wellwritten (as far as poetry). The title is what caught my eye which is also good. I have a number of poems posted, mostly slam style but I'm awful with titles. I'm going to try my best to comeback later and read some of your stories. My intrest is piqued.



pS: if you don't mind how tall are you? you took the time to mention you're short, and I was just wondering.
BTW 'm not short:( 6'2") I've never once been called cute.
 
Read 2 stories

I just read 2 stories by Wicked-N-Erotic, "Summer's Secrets" and "A Learning Experience". I thought they were fantastic. Your writing is so very descriptive - you bring little details alive and paint a vivid picture of what is really going on. This is true of both the erotic and non-erotic parts of the stories. And I think I would be in heaven if a man gave me a "learning experience" like in your story... maybe I could get hubby to break out the handcuffs and honey? ;)

I only have one story posted so far, but I have another one almost done and you've inspired me to polish it up and get it posted.

Great job - I will check out your other stories and the stories of the other posters in this thread. Such a great idea!

JJ :rose:
 
I just read Champagne1982's "Screwed". Damn men! If I had a dick it would be rock hard.

Good story line. I loved the way you put it together with the wife going off to work leaving Jose alone to fix the gate. And the metaphor of the screwdriver was great.

Where did you say, Jose was? :p
 
Re: Read 2 stories

DirtyJJ said:

Great job - I will check out your other stories and the stories of the other posters in this thread. Such a great idea!

JJ :rose:
Click to expand...

I completely agree, this is a brilliant idea.

JJ, I just read your story "Under the Desk," and was very impressed. I've never written in the first person-present tense, heck, I don't even know the correct term for it. To me it kind of read like an extremely good Penthouse Letter- that is supposed to be a compliment, btw. ;)

It took me the first few lines to get into it (mainly because I rarely read stories written in that tense,) but after that it had a very good flow to it, and was extremely sexy. The stuff of a lot of guys fantasies, no doubt.

Thanks for a very hot read!

Loulou :kiss:
 
LouLou,
Thanks for your feedback, and I am glad you liked the story. I have heard from a few other people about the tense - it is pretty tricky to write that way but it seemed to fit for this story. It makes it more personal for me I guess, but I really have to keep the readers in mind because not everyone likes that style. My next story is straight first-person, not the "I-you" tense.

I don't know if this style gives away that these are very personal fantasies for me... but in the future I want to try and write about someone other than myself!

JJ
:rose:
 
Faithful

Hi Tatelou,
I just read your story and I was impressed. I actually was sitting there like you do at a horror movie going, "NO! Don't run from your hiding place! He's right there!" Does the silly bimbo listen? Absolutely not.
I think the dog should get all 3 steaks. As a matter of fact, I wonder what the story would have played like if Bob had been a little less faithful to his humans and a lot more to his stomach...

Destinie: Hi! I'm 155 centimeters tall or 5 feet 1 inch in hieght.
 
More, more, more

Hey, Cookiejar. I just read "A Rose for Kristophe" (it was first). I sent you feedback on it. It left me wanting more, but I think you cheated yourself somewhat when you wrote it.

Thanks for reading and enjoying "Shadows in the Dark." It was intended as a series of 3 stories, but I haven't finished them yet.
 
Re: More, more, more

Flashlight7.5 said:
Hey, Cookiejar. I just read "A Rose for Kristophe" (it was first). I sent you feedback on it. It left me wanting more, but I think you cheated yourself somewhat when you wrote it.

Thanks for reading and enjoying "Shadows in the Dark." It was intended as a series of 3 stories, but I haven't finished them yet.
Click to expand...


Ty flashlight...Each story is a learning experience with me. I hope to improve with each one. I'm working on drawing my stories out more.:)


Tatelou I read "Faithful"... interesting premise and I was hooked after the first few paragraphs. Btw...I loved Bob..lol:)
 
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