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bentover

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Aug 20, 2003
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Okay, here's my question about anal fisting.

Earlier today my gf attempted to fist my ass. There was no pain, and tons of lube, but for some reason she just couldn't get her damn hand all the way in!

She doesn't have all that big of hand either.

It seemed to her that she was hitting on my pelvis bone and just couldn't squeeze through.

I was wondering what experience other people have had with this and if any of you knew a way for her to work her entire hand up my ass.

Like I said, there was no pain and we used tons of lube. I really felt that I should have been able to take all of her hand, but she just couldn't get it in the hole.

Thanks,
 
The absolute best resource for information on anal fisting is RedRight Web. Sexuality.org also has a guide to handballing. Unfortunately most information out there is for gay men, but that doesn't mean straight men and all women can't take advantage of it.

I don't know enough about handballing to tell you definitively that you were unable to take it all the way for size reasons. I've heard that's a possibility for men (and women who are fisted up the ass), but I don't know for sure. Judging by the anatomy it's possible that was your situation, especially if you were otherwise prepared (lube, communication, mental prep etc) to take it. Definitely read up on those sites, though.
 
the only advice i can offer on this one is take your time. i've had my boyfriend fist my arse and we had the same porblem, it felt like there was a barrior, but if you do it ridiculously slowly its possible. i guess its to do with muscles relaxing and getting used to something big being in there or something.
get your girlfriend to put as much of her hand in as she can and when she hits a wall get her to stop and leave her hand there for a while, maybe while she sucks your dick. then get her to ease her hand up a little more, after a while it get easier and you can get a nice in out rhythm going :)
 
Just a word of warning I got from my sister, who's an OB/GYN. She says that while vaginas can usually accomodate a fist, the anus is not going to be automatically so flexible. And if the muscles around the anus are ruptured or torn, surgical repair may be necessary, and a 100% fix is not guaranteed. Which means there could be problems with anal leakage which persist.

Take that for what it is worth to you.
 
I personally fisted my own ass with out much problems, of couse I have been gapping my ass on a regular basis for the past two years, and wearing 3 inch butt plugs for hours at a time. I have never herd of any one having ripped or torn muscles, but i guess it could happen if your not carefull. I've also herd that muscle relaxers, like flexoral help out alot. I have never used them, I like to do it all on my own. Just a thought, but it is an option that is out there.
 
I am in the same boat as sqerlyassman - I have been using large dildos and 3-inch plugs on my ass for at least 2 years and can fist my own ass, but it actually is still difficult to get the hand past those last knuckes. Instead of a fist, perhaps if your g/f makes her hand more flat and curved inward, that might help. And sometimes that pelvic bone is an obstacle - my 3-inch plug is also tough to get in and stay, I have to work up to it. And sometimes if I angle myself right, I can actually lower myself onto my hand, making for an easier and fuller entry...
 
My wife fists me on occasion, but it's always after what is essentially an all day prep. Of course there's the cleaning aspect, but then comes the stretching... Which is kind of a misleading word. It's more about relaxing than it is stretching. As was mentioned, anal fisting can cause severe damage, so don't EVER skimp on the prep work if you're dead set on it.

The reason it feels as though bone is stopping her hand, is because your sphincter muscles are actually quite strong. I think there are some people who simply cannot safely take a fist. Perhaps that's you?

When I'm going to be fisted, I usually start with butt plugs a few hours prior. I pop one in until it gets difficult to hold in place with more than a small amount of effort, and then size up... Until I reach a fairly large plug (about 3" in diameter). If that size doesn't pop in with zero pain (it will still be an intense sensation), I will call off fisting for the evening and try again next week at least. Not tomorrow. Not a few days. I give it a week at least. We may play with toys, but nothing extreme. I also use light colored toys for anal prep, so I can see if there is any blood. Even a speck? Calling it off for more like 2 weeks.

Patience will pay off. I promise. It's too dangerous not to. She always wears nitrile gloves (latex allergy), and keeps her nails short. No rings (duh). She doesn't ever make a fist until her entire hand has been inside me comfortably. She MUST listen to your communication. Slow means slow. No means no. Out means out... Now. If you're used to BDSM play, I recommend forgetting safe words. What you say is what you mean (and make sure the fingers are extended on an emergency pull out. NOT balled up in a fist).

Don't push boundaries with fisting. The point is, you're approaching extreme boundaries already. Do NOT use numbing gel, and do NOT engage under the influence (top or bottom).

This is an exercise in clear communication of the utmost importance. There is a fine line between ecstacy and emergency when someone's hand is inside your body. Also... Please don't go further than the wrist. Those who do are dangerously close to fatal consequences.
 
cubbyfire04 said:
My wife fists me on occasion, but it's always after what is essentially an all day prep. Of course there's the cleaning aspect, but then comes the stretching... Which is kind of a misleading word. It's more about relaxing than it is stretching. As was mentioned, anal fisting can cause severe damage, so don't EVER skimp on the prep work if you're dead set on it.

The reason it feels as though bone is stopping her hand, is because your sphincter muscles are actually quite strong. I think there are some people who simply cannot safely take a fist. Perhaps that's you?

When I'm going to be fisted, I usually start with butt plugs a few hours prior. I pop one in until it gets difficult to hold in place with more than a small amount of effort, and then size up... Until I reach a fairly large plug (about 3" in diameter). If that size doesn't pop in with zero pain (it will still be an intense sensation), I will call off fisting for the evening and try again next week at least. Not tomorrow. Not a few days. I give it a week at least. We may play with toys, but nothing extreme. I also use light colored toys for anal prep, so I can see if there is any blood. Even a speck? Calling it off for more like 2 weeks.

Patience will pay off. I promise. It's too dangerous not to. She always wears nitrile gloves (latex allergy), and keeps her nails short. No rings (duh). She doesn't ever make a fist until her entire hand has been inside me comfortably. She MUST listen to your communication. Slow means slow. No means no. Out means out... Now. If you're used to BDSM play, I recommend forgetting safe words. What you say is what you mean (and make sure the fingers are extended on an emergency pull out. NOT balled up in a fist).

Don't push boundaries with fisting. The point is, you're approaching extreme boundaries already. Do NOT use numbing gel, and do NOT engage under the influence (top or bottom).

This is an exercise in clear communication of the utmost importance. There is a fine line between ecstacy and emergency when someone's hand is inside your body. Also... Please don't go further than the wrist. Those who do are dangerously close to fatal consequences.
Click to expand...
Excellent post. It should be placed in the bdsm library.
 
Fisting is not a quick fast experience. Took me the better part of six months to be able to stretch to accept a fist. Takes a lot of practice, patience, and stretching to make it happen. BUT, when it happens it is extremely enjoyable (and a bit addictive).
 
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