- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Bastards!
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Why is it that women love bastards?
We do! And the truth of it brings
Me to my opinion it's in the Darwinian
Natural order of things.
Are such men pre-disposed to be bastards
Or tutored as babes on the breasts
To be utterly charming, deft and disarming
Till they have us enthralled and undressed?
Are there bastardy badges at boy scouts?
Are the basic skills honed whilst at cubs?
In the dark, fetid gloom of some 'Men Only' room
Is it this they're discussing in pubs?
There are husbands who'll claim that they're single
Or their wives are too frigid or grand
But the unvarnished truth is their Sybil or Ruth
Know they're bastards – and DO understand.
They'll claim that they're staying late working
When they're chatting up girls fresh from school
And at quarter past two they'll crawl back to you
Still covered in lipstick and drool.
Yet the bastard will tell you he loves you
And your dressing gown falls in a heap
But the sum of his lust's a half dozen thrusts –
Then he's dreaming of her in his sleep.
Why is it that women love bastards?
The deeper the question one delves,
The more we'll regret: it helps us forget
We're not quite so perfect ourselves!
- COMMENTS
Iraniaover 14 years agoI just found this poem and it is but freaky good. Ain't they just that? Da basterds. Tell ya' what is baby, met a few girlies in my short visit to the planet who meet the defn just more an a bits. Absolutely frickin awesomely stupendously coolio deliciously radically differentest poem about da basterd dat ever a lesbo could read. I swear if I didn't have a girlfriend . . .
normal jeanalmost 15 years agothis didn't get a big green E!
I loved every single strophe and have one teeny pick, did you mean "bastardly"?
I keep reading "bastardy" over and it seems not quite right, but in such a witty, well thought out poem, it is but a mote. Woman, you gots da talent and loads of it.
Safe_Betalmost 15 years agoGreat as usual doll! Well written and it cracked me up! Loved it! :)
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Also loved the comment, "Are you a lesbian?"... He aparently doesn't really get your name, now does he! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!
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Come visit us at the Isle of Lesbos thread in the GLBT Chatter forum. It's been too long since we "chattered"! *MUAH*
greenmountaineeralmost 15 years agoThis beats a sitcom any day. Between this and Under Your Spell's "Ode to a Dung Beetle," posted today as well, I have a lot to think and laugh about tonight.
UnderYourSpellalmost 15 years agoOh well just look at it this way men were the first rough draft so there are bound to be a few glitches!
peachesmelbaalmost 15 years agoBut funnily said,
In meter and rhyme-
To beat out the time.
And all of that aside, I loved the humor, wit, irony (and truth)of it-and I raised two sons dammit!
