One of the hoter and better sexfight stories i have ever read. I rate its erotic scenes with B+ . However i rate the plot, the building tension with a BIG A++ . This is the more difficult part in erotic literature, to describe sn erotic scene is easier (not easy, easier). My hat is off for wonderer4 !!
Congratulations. Much better than F5-Heirlooms—I had to push myself to finish that one, while this one left me feeling disappointed that there wasn’t more. You still need to hook up with one or two of the volunteer editors for proofreading, if nothing more, but this one would be worth their time and yours. Thank you for writing this and sharing it.
Needs lots and lots of work. Not nearly as good as the other F5 I read. Sorry.
Do not deserve to continue breathing
Hahaha, just enough creep factor here to stand up some hair. So Cassie is riding an orgasm to eternity. Dont fence me in.
Good syfi and mystery, I don't think Roz is alive but cassie is. Where she is, is another concern.
once I got into it ,realized I had read before.
better than a many of stories on here.... Really good. Thanks very much, TTT.
I'm glad PatientLee pointed me to this story. I don't think I've seen a more gripping and yet erotic story anywhere. I'm off to read more of your works.
'people next store'
Shouldn't that be 'people next door'?
Not the only story I've seen that in, so is that a common speech to text glitch?
till your past and present catches up in the future. TK U MLJ LV NV
i really enjoy your writing.
I like the smut, but you get more in-depth about high school and the college application process than is really necessary.
Better than the wimpy JPB ending but this chapter didn't really follow the previous story. It seemed to jump from 4 people getting along with him to 4 people trying to kill him in his front yard. This ending might have worked if the story would have taken a little longer and developed the story line but this was too abrupt. Gave JPB's story 1* because of the pussy ending. Gave this one 2* because the bitches got what they deserved, but come on; 4 loving people to 4 trained killers in 2 paragraphs. Just too fast.
Not that it makes any difference at all, but my take on Hephaestus is that his lameness came from his trade, a smithy disease. Bronze is made of copper and tin, but the earliest form of bronze is an alloy of copper and arsenic, and smelting it produced arsenic fumes in the smithy. Arsenic poisoning in low doses can cause peripheral neuritis with loss of function in the extremities. Arsenic bronze wasn't used much after 2,500 BCE, so I've always thought this dated the roots of the Hephaestus myth to before that.
So, just as the mad hatter refers to an occupational hazard of working with felt 500 years ago, the lame smithy, I suggest, also references an occupational hazard. No OSHA back then.
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