I have read all 8 chapters ... loved but wtf happens next???
You have a good ability to tell a story - keep it up
just two things I noticed - chapter 1 I think I noticed TAIL instead of TALE
and this chapter SAT IN came out as SATIN
easy mistakes to make - no worries
well done - 5 star read
Don't get me wrong, the story is fairly hot but the writing is awful. Misspelled words, poor grammar and dialogue so stilted and unnatural it makes gonzo porn seem like "Great Expectations". Could've been a 5, but I ended up giving it a 3 due to all the flaws.
I hope you're still writing, because I've been eagerly awaiting the next chapter.
Fantastic writing, engaging story, and hot sex. The winner for me by far.
I loved the whole story. I was very pleasantly surprised by the plot and the twists.
Where can I find more this is hot
read 3 chapters now - this should be published as a novel - probably have to tone down some of the sex for general release though. But I think it is excellent
I do believe I would of divorced her right after I left the first "Swingers Hotel Convention".
More please!!!! You left us hanging
even for you. "after the presidential election". What a line. What a story. Fantastic, as always. My Christmas favorite.................
I absolutely loved this story and I hope for a prequel or sequel or another very similar story. You have talent. Don't waste it and continue these awesome stories!
Great authors create great character development. Your hilariously neurotic, quick witted PI (and his spiteful Leia) had me sucked right in. I'd be all over reading about more misadventures of "James" if if you choose to expand that thread, you've left yourself plenty of opportunity to. If not, job well done nonetheless.
every bit as good as the first part
Like the mix of an action story and plenty of hot sex
Good effort, keep going ... but where's the rest - dying to know who the 3 dudes are
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