Please write more
most men fantasize about their mate being with another man or woman.
When you guys talk about second person I'm not sure what you mean. This story is in the first person, but it uses "you" rather than a character name. A second person viewpoint would be entirely about "you" without "I" as a character. First person with "you" as the other character is extremely common on Literotica, especially in bondage porn.
What is more unusual is the use of the present tense.
I'm so sorry, but I must say it: it's spelled navel, not "naval".
Naval pertains to a navy, that branch of the military that operates at sea.
It's a personal thing. It's not the first time I see this spelling mistake and it honestly drives me nuts.
It ended on a cliff-hanger, that and it looks like you take up to three months to update. I have really enjoyed both chapters of slave girls. Initially I was concerned that although you are very good at suggesting sexual scenes that fire the imagination, being greedy I wanted more. I'm relieved that this didn't remain the case. The sexual scenes in these chapters were excellent and arousing.
Now that I've commented on the main reason for my motivation to reading on this site is the sex, I have to comment on the other contents of this story. The characters are very well drawn and interesting, the snippets of back stories are revealing and entertaining. I would really like to see more, I feel a bit invested in Marek, Lauren and Heather.
It's a shame you haven't received more attention, I think you are very good and sincerely hope you can continue.
One of the most original stories I've read in a long time. This was a fascinating read into Charlie's psyche. I hope for a second part or epilogue to finish the story.
Wow i love it!! wish this could happen to me
A very short compilation, barely a taste but the first and last story were good enough to want me to carry on reading. Well written and although described as short they still felt too short!
This is an excellent story, fresh and creative and I would love to read many more like this.
The writing is very rough. The spelling, grammar and difficult flow really take away from the enjoyment of reading it.
The storyline to me rated more than 5 stars but the difficult read brought it down to a 3.
Thank you for writing and posting here.
I'm sorry this fictitious story wasn't realistic enough for you. Feel free to write your own very successful and realistic stories instead of wasting time commenting on mine.
Shifts attitude a lot. Especially Pip and Emma.
The minute he got lose he called the Police. She had nothing to prove he was guilty of anything. He had his beaten and torn body, the stupid bitch took pictures and her DNA was everywhere. She spent the rest of her life in prison. He sued and took every penny she had. Your ending was ludicrous.
Have her finger his smelly BUTTHOLE and suck out the chocolate candy. Great sexy story.
When the Police found him he pressed charges against Zoe. He had her DNA in his mouth. Her fingerprints were on the dildo. When they searched her car his blood was in her trunk. She went to prison for life. End to a really stupid story.
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