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Very rich in its imagery, Moondark. I really enjoyed S1&2, and "yellow pissed colored/Sun" started as a "Wow!," but I couldn't get pass a drenching urine connoting "calm, still surfaces" unless I misunderstood the sentence structure.

indulgent

naive and wallowing, no one wants to kill, besides nutters, they defended your right to write this lol you cant possibly learn whata punch in the face is like from a video game lol

Alan Turing OBE : Happy Birthday!!!

even after he cracke dthe enigma code which helped Brits win the war they chemically castrated him in '52 for the 'heinous crime" of homosexuality!?!
Nations who humiliate their heroes are condemned to kiss the feet of defeat in near future !!!----an old saying .........OM

I hate sadness

I hate sadness, and I hate poetry that makes me sad, especially in such a subtle and roundabout way. I never even saw it coming.

This was fantastic. Please don't do it again. Please.

Do.

I said I hate poetry

I do hate poetry, and once again this is excellent, eloquently capturing a small moment in time that mirrors the thoughts and emotions we've all had (more than once) for a fleeting longish-instant in our lives, reflecting something we at least momentarily desired, but not really enough to go after. Desire, passion, eroticism, opportunity, and a tinge of regret in a world of myriad what-ifs, all captured in a handful of lines and words.

Excellent.

I hate poetry

I hate poetry and this was absolutely marvelous in many different ways. Thank you for sharing it.

Words are aphrodesiacs

Sculpting lust from starving minds.
Painting wanton portraits
The most carnal of designs

Thank you LinneaLundin

To have a great friend, you must first be one. Don't you think?

She is lucky to have a great friend like you.

A 2nd look

A good poem deserves that IMO. I've already commented on how smart line 8 is and how its seguays nicely to the last lines. What I like about them is they made me think about who the "two" are. Is it your husband and child or perhaps your lover and you? The latter seems plausible given what proceeds it in the poem. Either way, it engaged me, ie, made me stop and think, which is what a good poem does.

BTW, these arthritic fingers accidently hit the "3" button for a rating. The poem is much better than that.

Excellent

I recall an earlier iteration of this one. Very evocative and moving, especially that ending.

GM : sometimes i'm blown away by your compliments .......and this is one of those times!!

these lines crept into my mind as I was sitting in my study reflecting on my dead son Animesh.......and I couldn't actually find any logical reasoning behind these words beyond a simple rhyming felicity .........maybe the Great Communicator spoke something to me which I couldn't catch ...........

PS

Just caught the double-entendre in the title, which presumably is why you stopped at the door and didn't knock.

Sad Father's Day remembrance.

Your words so often resonate with vivid images. That's certainly the case here. My only critique is "sentinels dodged by cell phone zombies" doesn't add much IMO and seems to take the reader away from the theme.

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