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Latest 15 Reader Comments

Everybody's Getting Some

Air signs are mad blue too.

Tossing?

throwing the thrill. nice.

Thank you

Thank you for listing the names of the victims of the 'Pulse' shooting. I had not read the names before, but I did now. It is interesting to me that you accompanied it with the excerpt from 'Leaves of Grass'. I do not know why you did it that way, but I am often clueless of things like that. I shall read it again and try to solve my mystery. I certainly see the juxtaposition of the peacefuless and joy of Whitman's poem and the horror of that night in Orlando.

I lost too

My girl is not there, and I do care, we'll not meet again after all this time

@Prolonged_Debut10

Sadly, to attempt to answer your question about where things fit, I would need to teach a lesson in reading poetry. I retired from teaching three years ago. Perhaps, since you find my poetry so lacking in finesse, you shouldn't read it? Just a thought...

@Prolonged-Debut10:

Ever heard of free verse? There is no meter, there is no rhyme. As to what belongs and doesn't in the poem, surely you cannot think to precrsibe that as well?

  on

Good start

Now, turn it into poetry. Poetry uses word, rhythm, sound, to paint like painters use pigments. Listen, write it so others will want & be able to memorize it. Make your experience link with all the others who feel the same way, despite different lives, different times, different women. Then you'll have poetry, & then you'll have been a comfort, a fellow traveler, a poet.

A gem

I don’t think I have seen this one before. It works beautifully—light where the danger is to fall into sentimentality, yet so moving. Great turn in the third stanza—it has the feel of a modern sonnet, without the constraints.

I am left thinking of my parents (now dead) and their neighbors in assisted living/nursing/rehab homes (and the implicit and guilty thought of “I don’t want to find myself there in 20 years,”) and broke down. Your poem reminds me of John Prine’s “Hello in There,” a song that gets me every time.

Lovely, gm.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

SOME FOLKS THINK ANATOMY COULD BE A PLAYTHING

but vs. a p/c with memory and bites no way, TK U MLJ LV NV

Lovely

These are lovely verses. smiles Méli.

Thank you, Susan. I write ‘em as they come. Some sassier than others.

Interesting

I'd like to read more of your work. Your word play has some sass. Thanks.

I like this, SinfulSexPot; the way the changing seasons contribute to meaning. Most readers think of winter metaphorically as death, but here you add a nice twist to it, something sorely missing in most expressions of modern art.

A couple of suggestions: too many "ing's" give the impression the poet has opted for an easier way, rather than stretch the language with more imagination.

"'T'is" feels antiquated. It stands out too much and draws attention away from the essence of the poem when "It's" would do just as well.

I look forward to reading more of your work.

Thanks for your kind words, Tzara. I'll submit a poem elsewhere once in a while which usually results in a rejection form letter. That's ok. My primary audience is my beautiful wife and two grown children.

Sometimes experienced poets will post. I enjoy reading them, but what I most enjoy are the fledgling poets who, if they keep their enthusiasm, will continue to polish their poems.

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