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Latest 15 Reader Comments


Spell checkers will not catch when you spell the wrong word the right way.

Hear is correct when you mean for example "Do you hear that noise?"

Here is correct if you mean the place where you are, not someplace else.

for spelling and grammar

You might try replacing your old version of Word with LibreOffice.
It is free, available for Windows, Mac OS-X and Linux, and there are dictionary and grammar checkers available for it in many languages and locales which are also free.

If there is room on the hard drive of your laptop you can install and try it without uninstalling what you have now.

Hot and very arousing

What's with you and boats and sex? Obviously takes your writing to another level. Very arousing story. On a par with "Lakeside Seduction" - one of my all time favorites. Thank you.

spelling errors

I'm aware of the spelling and grammar errors. SORRY! My fingers are not as fast as my brain is and unfortunately the word version on my laptop is very old and doesn't always catch grammar errors in sentence construction. I always appreciate the feedback though!!!!!! Its hard to catch all the errors when you're the author and proof reader. ;)

Not Fair!

I think Kelly should have waited until immediately after he earned his money and then shared some of the extra effort with his squirrely sister..

hope you enjoy

my hope is you enjoy this story as it is my first. please feel free to comment and yes i do know it is not perfect

More please

You have a way with words that excites me, so more little adventures please.

good start

i read your critics and they are correct. there are glaring mistakes as in my comment but you have imagination that brings the reader's imagination to participate with your story... keep writing and learning and get some editing help. You might be a real writer.

Loving hot & sex in the elevator


I absolutely loved your story! There was a legitimate build up in characters wih back stories and a plot. A previous commenter had written that you put subtle clues so the ending wasn't as big a surprise but it had that slight twist in the end that has all your readers wanting more - including myself!

You did a great job and I really look forward to a "part two" of this!

"The man tall man"

Why are you posting a story that obviously you have not bothered to re-read your self, or get edited. The developing plot appears to be good. The story is difficult to read because of so many grammar mistakes. If the main character is suppose to have skills to kick ass; why would he allow his drunk ass father knock him around. Looking to see improvement in chapter two.

Thank you

It is so nice to find stories that have such cock hardening sex tied with equally heart tugging loving emotion. Will

Feeling Disturbed

Love your work, and wait expectantly for your next yarn. Really enjoyed the fiery car story-waiting for the next chapter in that series.
This one "quantum entanglement" I enjoy the characters, especially the Professor and Chavonne. However, the casual way in which he murders two people is really disturbing, then fakes a tear to throw off the police. It always makes me ask is the good Professor a sociopath or even a psychopath. It just seems a little extreme form of retribution. True, its just a yarn, a work of fiction and a little drama a morality tale if you will, and does not need to adhere to a rational universe. Still a good yarn, thanks for your body of work I've read most of them quite a few times and always look forward to the next. I'd login and have my name up but I'm to lazy.

bad spelling distracts

I look forward to reading the sequels to this. However, before publishing, print the story out, and read it the next day. Only publish when you have checked a hard copy. Things like spelling mouth as moth distract from the story, and break the flow.

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