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Latest 15 Reader Comments

OR A PHONE SOLICITOR PITCHES

and we still have the glitches. TK U MLJ LV NV

Pel , how would this sound ( in the 4th & 5th lines):---

An ordinary call would have come thru'----
Sometimes Hi-tech makes a fool of me 'n you !?

@Pel. Thanx for compliments.....&

Honey ....the movie is sci-Fi , great & worth watching !!

Sometimes Technology trips us up..... & makes us fall ??!...

...on so many different levels, on and off the screen
Clever Ash
and should this come with a film spoiler alert too?

Very true, Ash!
I would go as far as to say even electricity can be an enemy sometimes.
You also made very good acoustic music to my ear with your 1-3-7 rhyme.

5ed.

@ Mer

I so do empathise with you and thank you for your comments

re: HoneyAdored

Thank you for your comments!

Fascinating...

I like how the form mirrors falling to the end.

intersting

I know this might not help my religion but I don't care. I'm a Mormon and this sounds the last paragraph any ways sounds almost like a testimony, and what a consistency at the time of this comment I just been to church.

High praise for Low Star

Congrats for your win the month Your poem took me to places I've never been.

But I agree with Angeline, that the third stanza seems a bit disjointed. After looking at this NASA video, I quite get your awe at tendrils.

http://www.space.com/15154-dancing-star-s un-magnetic-tendrils-share-plasma-video.htm

You might want to try revising the next line to something like this

"Cast off into the void, never to return"

Me in high school

I used be exactually like that in high school I climb those steps to the top of the school winch leads to the roof. I reach for the door and I turn back was it fear? or was it' some thing else like the voices? But I'm better now, no longer I think of killing myself.

For those of you planning on killing your self just please please I'm begging you, remember my little story, and that it won't be easy or quick. But eventually things would get better and you would eventually think that the reason for you to kill yourself was not worth it at all. And everyone else can go duck themselves. Hell you may even ask yourself why you what to kill yourself the next time when you have that desire to. NOT SHITTING YOU!!!!!!! SEAROUSE SHIT!!!!!!!

Another biographical moment?

The last stanza hit me right in the gut. How cruel he was to you, how cruel

Melancholy

Your poem connects too closely with feelings I've had. Phrases well turned, the message so well framed.

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