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a poetic

Confessional , Ellen ? but judgement be damned your poem's really good .........


could rival La Mancha and his Impossible Dream...TK U MLJ LV NV

This is so hard to read now.
It's a stupid, pointless and unworthy piece of writing borne of bitterness.
I hate myself for writing it.
I would delete it, but that's too much like pretending I never wrote it.
I have just been unable to control my feelings or their expression when it comes to her. I hate myself for that, because now it really does feel like the end of everything.


just think of all the points traveled on. TK U MLJ LV NV


I didn't get a chance to comment on PF&D, I am very glad to do it here. It is a hard-hitting poem - no pun intended. I like the way it moves from the "we" to "I" to "you"... leading through the progression of abusive behavior. You've pulled no punches - a hard poem to read but so very very good. It reminds me of an old art house movie that I thought was set in Oz, maybe in Aboriginal communities, but I can't remember the name of it for the life of me. And anyway, the poem hits on a truly universal problem. "Lovely" doesn't seem the right word; moving, Tod - extremely moving!

Tod : the underlying worry immanent in this heart-tuggingly poignant Poem is ----

" Is History repeatin' itself ????"
a Father's legitimate worry .....5-ed .

these words " watching your grandmother's blood mingle with mine
as she sheltered me from the blows with her frail body ..........."
are simply Divine lines , Tod !!

Loved it on the threads...

...and still love it here.

Only suggestions that I can make is...'a curse word buried in cheap piss,' I wonder if 'drowned' would be an alternative that might work better.

I think the space added between the last two lines improves it, but in my head I still like the 'and' but it works well with or without.

Excellent Tod, and a well deserved High 5

What about the Palmetto bugs?

This reminds me a bit of Penny Lane (by Beatles) only it's not in England, but in Florida. I was born in Miami and lived almost half my life in Hialeah. Really liked this for its odd, curious detail, and I can relate to Lizzie in quite a few ways. Thanks for sharing. :)


your date of the splendor of the view. TK U MLJ LV NV

How very lovely...

...I visited this a few times before leaving my comment, you have created a fine example of a sonnet. I really do hope the dry spell does not last too long for you.
You have inspired me...I feel a sonnet coming on.


/this was written for All Authors whom have been Dissed. Slandered,Poked, Prodded and Insulted. It should have been in 5 lines, but for be it from me to outguess those powers that be. TK U MLJ LV NV

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