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If it were in my power

If it were in my power I would bring you out of that darkness and change your location from "In the shadows of your mind" to the sunshine of my heart.

p.s.

I was not meaning to be critical in that reaction to your poem. I gave it a 5-star and then expressed what it triggered in me.

Imprisoned in a tenement

Can't move beyond the tenement prison where
life's full potential will never be approached
for the walls are not poetry-covered paper.

This prison of the poor will not contain
more than the body that carries
the spirit that soars to escape.

Escape!
Escape, crippling escape
in a world of inequality.
. . . And the rich grow richer
in our escape.

Hauntingly beautiful!

Another lovely, thought provoking poem MzFly.
Thank you so much and please post more!
Doc

I hope it proves to be untrue.

"Ladies and gentlemen

the final words of PacoFear........ and he was never heard from again."

For this would be most unfortunate.

Sexy and artistic, without sacrificing the raw, rude sensuality of everyday life.

Real poets feedback

I need feedback from people who write poems all the time. This isn't my strong suit and I'm looking to become a much better writer from all angles. Again, real poets only. I do check profiles to see published works.

Sage advice

Excellent description and warning for all who enjoy the fine art.

from butters:

absolutely wonderful! shakespeare in the cowshed... brilliant :D

This had a raw frenetic tempo to it; even the rhymes scratched like long angry fingernails.

Well done.

Depressing.

It may be true but still depressing. Sorry.

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