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Lay of the Land

Get the feeling there's a BIG PUNCH of a story to unfold. Great care is being taken to pace the "building of this tale" and the cultivation the interest. The devil is in the details and there sure enough details so this is no "quick fix" jump to the finish story. Looking forward to the "unfolding"of the "measured" release of each installment.

Since the words are already written just being "brushed up a bit" wondering if there is a simple freehand map some where along the way that could provide a visual companion to the detailed descriptions of locations and their respective relativity to each other.

Not looking for a "Rand McNally" just a simple sketch.

One Day at a Time,
The Ol' Man

Yep. That's How I Would Handle Hank

I was thinking about burying Hank in the creek even before our story teller mentioned removing the rocks from the creek. I don't guess he and Maggie ever mended their differences. But any woman who takes the word of her boyfriend's longtime enemy over her boyfriend deserves whatever comes her way. If you stop and think about it, she could have prevented all of this...if she had not been so stupidly gullible.

This series

is creepy as hell. Great writing, btw.

Great!

Thank you for that bit of unexpected fun. I very much enjoyed it!

Good premise

Liked this story a lot but as already said a few tyos and unlikely non-involvement of authories let it down. I kept waiting for social services, the hospital authorities and the police to get involved a lot earlier given the stolen child, fraudulent registration of birth and adoptioN sub-plot.

BTW when it came to police involvement, in the UK people get 'cautioned' not 'read their Miranda rights.

Despite this good story and look forward to seeing more.

She-it man!

My comments still stand SHE THE SLUT WIFE IS THE UGLY CHEATER ALSO FUCKEN PLEEEEEEEEEZE ITS ALL FICTION SO THERE! Love you all! GREG. OH 100 % OF READING ENJOYMENT BYE. (Maybe just maybe they all are fucked up friends and all)

Well THAT was fun......or not.

Harsh but entertaining story about the demise of a marriage. I don't see that he has any choice but to get a divorce. There seems to be no going back and with his wife showing her true colors, there's no going forward. Not sure he should be jumping into any other relationship any time soon. Just get the divorce, keep working on his weight and move forward without the fat shrew attached to his neck. A sequel could be interesting. Thanks for the read.

concered, but I understand.

just be careful Shytammy, I've loved reading your writing, i would hate to hear i won't have the pleasure of reading your stories because you met with a less than favorable situation.

You sure have an exemplary talent and you showed it in this story. I just hope you keep writing as its been 5yrs since this story. Gifted and talented writers like you and JammyJimmy are rare! I'm glad you concluded this story and not left us hanging.

With your writing ability I suspect you have gone into publishing for profit - I wish you good fortunes, if so, what is your writers name? Thanks and salute....

I did think the snake was going to get him, had me on the edge for a while.

UK School System

Nice stories (Prison and Return) but you really need to get au fait with the English school system. They don't have school boards, tend not to have professional coaches, and few can afford to have athletic programmes of any sort. Confusingly 'public Schools' are very exclusive private schools and the equivalent of US public schools are State Schools.

Thanks everyone

Thanks to everyone for their comments; they are valuable and are appreciated. Especially the constructive criticisms.

Based on these, I hope (and think) the second chapter of this story will be good for y'all. It was submitted yesterday, and I hope it'll be published soon.

Testamonial

Have had family members die in my arms, have had to bury a child have had friends leave us for a host of reasons WAY BEFORE what seemed to be their time. Currently have friend who was mountain climbing one Sunday and Wednesday her stomach swelled up like a basket ball. Yes it is the "BIG C"! Underwent weeks of chemo and before completed had emergency surgery to remove a lot of her innards. She's doing OK today but knows full well the fight is not over.

For us. your readers, your writing skill is so powerful over such a lengthy period of time the characters, and how you present each of them, the good and the bad, ARE NOT characters in a story they have become PERSONALITIES to us.

Sure we know that they are not real but we, your readers, CARE about each of them and readily transfer feelings we have and had with REAL people to your characters.

That my dear WW this is the greatest testimonial, this reader believes, ANY writer would covet. The second "testimonial" to you is the on going exchanges between us and your good self. Doubt many of us will ever meet you in person but you ARE A REAL PERSON who takes ACTION to show we are valued. Many days KNOW there will be no "update" posted but check to see and read the posts from others and the exchanges you provide.

Believe Arthur Cannon Doyle is immortalized today because Sherlock Holmes was, and still is, a PERSONALITY to so many. You sir are gifted with that skill. Use it don't abuse it.

One Day at a Time,
The Ol' Man

@WW...reply

(So, I am sorry if these stories have not come across well, and I hope they'll be more understood as the nest few stories come out. Of course I never just stop pouring it on after one story, n'est pas?)

Please don't misunderstand my intent. I'm still a large fan of your work. I was only attempting to point out that I felt that this one area of deep emotional impact is where I detected a noteworthy lack in what you are doing and/or how you are doing it. However, I can simultaneously accept that in the context of the larger narrative, sacrifices may need to be made so that chapters don't balloon to 30 pages instead of 3. Trust me in that I find your stories quite attention-getting and riveting. So while I offered $0.02 on the subject, I accept that you may find my thoughts worth even less than that - or not. Whatever the case, you still have a fan in me.

good

An interesting story, told with just the right amount of fantasy.

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