10.19.16 Wednesday

Stillness. Thrift store shopping. As unsure as I was before but in a different way. As if my mind is fly paper, the kind that twirls out, sticks mercilessly, and costs very little. God is with you says women older than me. In one hour, I get it to look at it all again and again. The dirty bits and the clean. Find a way to repair it. Dump out my purse. I drove from Detroit to get here. I know I'm supposed to feel something. Time is ticking. I begged for friendship; groveled for love. It felt like then but I know I don't like feeling that way. With them both. He, unlike those two, pitied me. Some. I saw it in his eyes and felt it in an awkward linger. We talked about the weather. He moaned and I was bored. Times are tough now.



Today, you are white chicken chili and $2.99 free internet access.