101 Lesbian Haikus From Hit Songs

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101 more haikus, as mini-tributes to hit songs, old and new.
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Part 2 of the 3 part series

Updated 06/09/2023
Created 08/25/2018
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Smokey125
Smokey125
617 Followers

Well well, and haiku-there! Big thanks to everyone who checked out my first collection of lesbian haikus. They turned out to be so much fun, I decided to make another compilation, and give myself an added challenge. These are 101 more haikus for lesbians, this time based on hit songs. Mini-parodies, if you will, of hits by 101 different singers and groups. They’re arranged chronologically, by dates of the original source songs, from the first half of the 20th century to the mid-2010s. I did my best to choose songs that are decently recognizable by title and key lyrics. And a fair amount of license is taken, as most songs’ rhythms aren’t going to reflect this specific 5-7-5-syllable pattern. How many of the original songs can you identify?? Some of them are tricky! I’ll give you the first one ’cause it’s kind of impossible to figure out. If you’d like to know any others—or the entire list—just ask. Have fun!

*****

[1] Who needs strip clubs now?
Just go online, see some tits,
pussies and some clits!
(“Puttin’ On The Ritz” by Irving Berlin and Fred Astaire)


[2] Fucking is my life,
my passion, gonna… Fuck me
a lady tonight!

[3] You’re incredible…
Your pussy, it tastes so good…
…You’re so edible…

[4] Frig, girls, don’t you sigh!
Masturbate your woes goodbye.
P-U-S-S-Y!!

[5] Wait…what do I feel??...
Is she making love…to me??
OHHHHH!!...Pretty woman!

[6] Get off of my hair…
Hey! Ow! Get off of my hair!
I want you down THERE!

[7] Got a good teasin’…
She wouldn’t please me at night;
she’s a day tribber.

[8] Hello, I love you…
though I just met you today.
…Please tell me you’re gay.

[9] When a woman loves
another woman…she can
do no friggin’ wrong.

[10] The world’s most ticklish
pussy’s mine…my name’s Heath­-er
Here is your feath-er

[11] When the truth is out,
and so am I…all the world
will know, I’ve got Pride!

[12] I’ll eat again, yet…
The first cunt was the sweetest,
but I’ll try yours too.

[13] Liz! Let’s go scissor!
It’s you, girl…you are my sin…
Now let’s get busy.

[14] Smokin’ hot daughter…
…I’m a dirty lady! I…
want my friend’s daughter!

[15] Ain’t no lesbian
like the one I’ve got. Oh no,
they don’t cum better!

[16] And it seems to me
you’re smoking hot, like scented
candles on my stand.

[17] Is she my real wife?...
Is she just a fantasy?...
Could she be my bride?...

[18] Needing you’s a crime!...
Dirty needs, can run! So! Deep!
…And the price is steep!

[19] You…might be my wife!
Live on land we’ll marry on…
…our nights and our days.

[20] Once I had sex, and
she had class. Fucked me doggy
style and spanked my ass.

[21] The! In-san-i-ty!
I’ve got girls all over me!
SOME-ONE’S RAM-MING ME!!

[22] Keep on with that thrust!
Don’t stop ’til we get enough!
Forced to give it up!

[23] Someone hear my prayer!...
Women! Women! Women! Come
quick after midnight!

[24] Eve’s an “anal” one…
Large or small, she likes all the
dildos in her bum.

[25] Sixty-nine all night!
What a way to take and give!
I feel so alive!

[26] Now I close my eyes…
…and I can feel you cumming
in my bed tonight!

[27] My lips can’t tell lies—
You’re naughty, bold and you’ve got
Bettie Page’s eyes.

[28] My blood runs hot…my
memory has just been shot!
…YOU HIT MY G-SPOT!!

[29] Every little kink
she has is massive! Every
fetish turns her on!

[30] Stalking prey tonight,
she’s watching young girls with the
eyes…of a cougar.

[31] Nurses gathered ’round,
examined me together…
Oh, the joy we found!

[32] Spot me a titty,
twat and a clitty tonight!
Gotcha, my pretty!

[33] In bed she is bound,
on her I go down, ’cause I’m
hungry like a MYLF!

[34] I’m SO excited
I’m about to lose my “juice!”…
I know I like it!

[35] Cinderella’s mine!...
I’m gonna fuck her past e-
lev-en-fifty-nine!

[36] Edge me to danger…
I’m! A! Hor-ny! Tied! Up! Girl!...
Burning for release!

[37] All right, I’ll bite! Yeah!
You’ve got me, now fuck me hard!
Till my pussy’s charred!

[38] Well, what can I say?...
Totally ripped you apart!...
…Turn over, bright eyes.

[39] Oh sweetie dear, yes,
you’re my honey bun, ’cause girls…
They want to have fun!

[40] She’s a wound-up girl,
and in her “oyster” is a
swollen, erect “pearl!”

[41] Relax, into it…
All the lesbians do it…
When they wanna cum!...

[42] I am gay as hell!
Lez, queer chick, one-way gay girl…
Lezzies understand.

[43] I can’t doubt the spark…
even if she is only
standing jaybird-stark.

[44] One night in Vegas
and I turned the hookers gay!
But they still ain’t free…

[45] I want you, Jodie…
I want to feel your touches…
I know it, Jodie…

[46] Could I lie with you?...
Should I vie for you, honey?...
…Would I die for you?

[47] You wanna hurt me?
Show me how deep my wound lies…
…Pleasure aches so good.

[48] Your boobs… beautiful…
Your cunt… yet more beautiful…
OHHHHH yeeeeeah… beautiful.

[49] Bad, bad, bad, bad girl
You make me feel so good… (yes!)
(Bad) girls will be girls!

[50] Tell me with your eyes…
Oh, no, you love girls, not guys.
…Let me rub your thighs.

[51] Scream till it’s over…
Hey now, I’ll penetrate you;
you’ll cum…you will cum!

[52] Ohhhh…she’s halfway there!...
She’s gonna take it, I swear…
…Givin’ it to Claire!

[53] Lock me up without
a chance of getting away…
Make me scream and shout…

[54] Place me between your
generous titties, let’s strum
each other’s clitties…

[55] Ooh, baby, do you
know that it’s true?...Ooh, heaven
is when I’m with you.

[56] You’ve got some tight stuff!...
Love how you’re so hot and strong…
You like it quite rough!

[57] Black velvet cuffs and
leather sex toys…black velvet,
girls will make some noise!

[58] Just a dual climax…
We cum together when our
pussies do contract.

[59] Wherever you grope…
Whomever you do… I’ll be
here, frigging to you.

[60] The butt-crack is a
little ol’ place where if you
touch me I will FREAK!!

[61] Listen to your heart,
’cause she is burning for me.
Give in to your heart.

[62] Jenni’s lots of fun…
Katie’s got a set of guns…
Ami’s hot as sun!

[63] Wife is gay, I’m gay!
Wanna ride her all night long!
She’s cummin’ my way!

[64] Load up the girls and
get them drunk; it’s fun to use
them and grope their junk.

[65] See?? Clit! Lick that thing!
Always constant lust I crave,
here, beneath this skin.

[66] Mon., Tues., Wed., no good…
Thursday I’m not in the mood…
…Friday I’m in lust!

[67] All I can say is
that you hit me like a train!...
Drove, me, (fuck!) in-sane

[68] Every lady yearns…
Sometimes, every lady tries…
…Every lady squirts!

[69] ¡Soy lesbiana!
I’m a taco, baby…so
why don’t you fill me??

[70] Cum in my hand now…
Afterglow, under the moon…
I’ll cum with you soon.

[71] My hair…spills and flows
everywhere when I’m on top…
Such beautiful hair…

[72] We have been spending
half our lives tribbing in a
Sapphic paradise.

[73] Pro, down on your knees!
And I’ll want my money back
if you cannot please!

[74] Oh, I’m just a girl,
who wants other girls, so please
let me out tonight!

[75] I want a pussy
around—what a thrill! I want
a pussy around!

[76] You’ve blown off my door…
What you feel…is my cum…and
my cum…will flow on…

[77] If you ever leave…
How will I trib without you?
Please don’t cum and go.

[78] Tell me which neat sex
position we’ll try today?...
I want it this way.

[79] I…want to spank you…
The best way to check my wife!
Then…you spank me too.

[80] I’ll show everything…
Welcome to my special place—
my legs wide open!

[81] I knew I’d fuck you
till I loved you…before you
would become my wife.

[82] Two lezzies scream, shout,
huff and puff and huff and puff!
Two lezzies, no doubt!

[83] I’m coming out, so
let’s get this orgy started!
I am cumming now!!

[84] Scratches on our backs…
I try to look cool, but my
cum-face is goofy!

[85] You’re so beautiful…
I flatter you, hope you’ll say
I can take you out!

[86] Hey there Shania…
ever been with a chick?... Dudes
don’t impress you much…

[87] Lesbian-hearted!
This cunt’s uncharted! I’m queer!
Let’s get unguarded!

[88] My wife is brilliant…
She’s thirty-four… Sings like a
dove… Fucks like a whore…

[89] I wanna feel a
hysterical Sybian!
I want vibrations!...

[90] And words turned dirty
when we fooled around, and how
wild emotions ran!

[91] You start at my toes,
and kiss me up to my nose,
and you make me smile.

[92] You know what I want,
and I know you’ve got it hard.
Girl, don’t hide your cunt!

[93] Don’t try to say no,
lady…it’s sex slavery…
…You belong to me.

[94] You feel me, you see…
My wife…would fuck…around, too.
But now we are free.

[95] Let’s bop, till we drop,
chick-fuck, I got lucky, now
don’t stop, make me pop!

[96] I heard…you came loud!
Only yesterday, you would
barely make a sound!

[97] Don’t care what you say,
don’t try to shame me, baby,
I watch porn this way!

[98] You call me kinky,
but baby, it’s true…it’s my
hottest fantasy.

[99] LOUDER! I’m dyin’!
I’m crampin’ like hell, but you
will still hear me ROAR!

[100] I don’t care if a
girl knows where my weak spots are—
everywhere! That’s what!

[101] Love me through and through
I’ll make sizzling love to you…
…Love me till I’m BLUE.
Sorry if I missed your favorites! But if so, let me know; I’ll try to knock out another batch soon enough!

Smokey125
Smokey125
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stroudlestroudleover 5 years ago
Loved this

Your Haikus are brilliant Smokey . So much work must go in to them , for which I doff my hat to you . No list would be complete with out KD Lang in it and you got a few of my Favourites too , Kate bush running up that hill , Alannah Myles Black Velvet and Fleetwood Mac Little lies to name just a few. Brilliant just brilliant . Into my Fav box you go and five stars for you

Thank you

JC

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