A Foray to Forget

His asshole puckers off my face still now hours later

The smell, once pheromone, now lye in my nostrils, trails anathema into my brain

It was his frail frame that failed to support his small, drooping paunch

It was a specious encounter: I never expected, I never asked for a bell-bottomed shape and his womanly hips and flabby thighs

I seek slim and slender, tight and tough: a man

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How did my lover, my love not his, turn to him, confident, desirous, rock-hard

While I found nothing but soured fantasies like cheese molded over

Toxic green, black, and blue blossom on my and my imagined ideal: a sick flowering of regret

I am left with a churning stomach and a previously unthought of doubt

_______________

So I retreat to a dream of perfect bodies, sinuous muscles, brilliant smiles, smooth lines, peerless technique, masculine charm, and unquenched libido

I drown myself in porn

I cleanse my pallet

And, now defeated and demure, I await success in the next sexual adventure