A Regret

I never have fought in a war
I can't pretend to the least understanding
Of what a firefight would be like
The sounds of war and men dying
The the fear or the rage one could feel

Cowering fear, towering bravery
Focus to purpose, uncontrolled savagery
The butchery of the kills, the humanity of mercy
Continuous cold, calculated wielding of death
Resigned and clam acceptance of fate

I don't WANT to have killed other people
I don't WANT to have made those decisions
I don't WANT to know bloodlust or terror
But I do regret not having taken
The ultimate test of a man