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Click hereapathetic undertow.
I'm not excited. Doubt I'm depressed,
or maybe I am, who would know?
Really I'm rather indifferent. . . perhaps.
Can't think straight, always pause
between the lines (it's getting worse).
There's a sort of acceptance going on
that I can't get passed or over or around;
It burns when I concentrate.
I can't even turn around I'm so stuck
in the gooey used sidewalk gum of apathy.
Letting the fire go out is not the answer,
and my greatest fear is falling
back into the re-run pit of mundane self-depreciation.
Can't get passed that damned will to live.
Helpless to fix it, I fight.
I conquer small battles, but
it's a long cold war and I much prefer Hawai'i.
My emotional clockwork is a bastard.
Ever ticking forward in denial of emotion
or triumph. Tick tick tick tick tick tick.
Emotional leprosy has consumed me.
Loved the line, "in the gooey used sidewalk gum of apathy." Such skill in the use of words. Wonderful.
Really well done with
Phrasing well selected to
Give a feeling of being apathetic...