April Showers

I don't have the time for cock unsure delusions.
I don't have the patience for May's mystery man.
A tale spun from fear is anything but true,
a letter of endings is nothing but threat.
I can think of a thousand kind ways to dismiss me,
a classic stab through the heart would have been a nice fit,
but to warp me and wrap me in paranoid delusions?
Think I'm dirty,- like I'm dirty-
then cast me away because of it...?

I don't have a kind word to express what I'm feeling;
I don't know what to say but I'm done with all this.
Think I'm dirty, -like I'm dirty-
he liked the way that I gave it;
His head on the backseat
while he watched as I spit.

I don't have the courage to take the man further.
I don't have the stomach for drama's king to fit
somewhere in silence that keeps screaming at me,
the threat of "they'll find out" is more than I can stand.
So I'm not sure what it is that makes people do this,
once there I learned quickly it was nothing different.
I can think of a thousand kind ways to dismiss him
but he's quicker and louder and has me feeling spent.