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Click here… was thinking about rough, randy sex
the kind where your muscles all tingle and flex
the sheets get all damp, wrapped ‘round your leg
much more fucking, than just getting laid …
… animal instincts, animal sounds
things not legal in some rural towns
the taste, the feel, of two people matting
extending the definition of dating …
… clothes cast aside and body parts eager
no care of the place, or who’s watching, either
all our attention on just copulation
and ultimate bi-polar orgasmic elation …
to a changing lifestyle from within, TK U MLJ LV NV
This was simple and to the point. Loved it. The rhymes were great and didn't seem forced. Almost "similar sounding" but not exact. Terrific!
"no care of the place, or who’s watching, either"- I don't think you needed these commas here. Especially before the word "either". The flow was great in this piece and I very much enjoyed. I don't know- I sorta got a giggle. Probably due to the rhymes.
Thanks for the great read, Dana
bi-polar in the title, you can bet I will read it ;)
you have a good rhythm going and it seemed like you were intending to rhyme throughout and then didnt..the only thing I have a question about though, is the word "matting"
did you mean "mating"?
overall, I did enjoy this poem