Broken Trust

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Broken Trust

Facing the pain of a broken trust,
The betrayal and hurt, nearly too much.
To bear,
To handle,
I wrestle and wrangle,
With the struggle to maintain my dignity,
Feeling great pride, not allowing any to see.

Overwhelming thoughts and feelings fill me.
Mostly of amazement and disbelief,
As I move along slowly, working through my grief.
Refusing to give in to the weakness of tears,
Even after all of these years.

Trying hard to keep my poise and composure,
Even while knowing He has within His hands complete exposure.
Shaking my head in pain and sadness,
I ache to feel happiness and gladness.

Moving beyond the deception,
Continuing along the path,
The first seeds of rebirth have had conception
Knowing they have now been sown,
I'll rise through the aftermath
Being unwavering in my resolve, seeing how I've grown.
Taking small steps to recovery, I'll be proud and strong,
As He knew all along.
Something that took me a while to believe in,
My slavery is a part of who and what I am,
So, I'll continue along, doing the very best that I can.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel,
I'm no longer swirling out of control in a vortex,
Spiraling round and round in a funnel,
My sanity and heart I will protect even under protest.

I've pulled myself up, and learned so much,
Most especially how betrayal and deception, broken trust hurts so very, very much.

Not giving in to the thoughts that All are as He is,
Hiding the pain behind these unbroken thick walls,
Seeing hope, just a glimmer,
Through another's eyes just how much my worth is,
Feeling the fire as it begins to smolder and simmer
Knowing He's going to still be here when the walls begin to fall.
Amazement and happiness as He has been near right along
His encouragement, belief and faith in me, giving me a reason to continue on.

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