Comfort Zone

On recommendation you might say
I was told from a friend to buy
This most comfortable garment ever
I am sure his intentions were not to lie.

So I got it in the mail post haste
My fingers were delighted by the touch
The fabric was so pleasing in my hands
I hoped my package liked it as much.

As I put it on I felt quite pleased
The material was so very silky soft
Plus so much room for my boys
Even my doc noticed when he had me cough.

Everything seemed hunky-dory at work
I was so comfy that time seemed to pass
Then I bent while doing my job
And my underwear crawled right up my ass.

Hoping it was just a fluke
I snagged and pulled myself as before
Then I bent down once again
And it slid right back in the crack of my door.

Nothing less dignified for a guy
Then a wedgy with your boxer briefs
Tugging at your crack is no fun
Wearing a thong is against my hetero-beliefs.

So buyer beware take it from me
Don't shop silky smooth, and for room
Stick to the traditions you know
Shop Hanes or Fruit of the Loom!