Comforting Candy Medicine

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This piece is actually a short story but can be classified as poetry due to all the vivid images and the way it's broken down. This certainly isn't the longest poem I've ever seen and I'm curious as to what others think. Thank you so much, as always, for taking the time to read this.
~princess~
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Comforting Candy Medicine

Do you ever wonder what it's like to live - but not really feel like you're living? How every day is another attempt to break free from the enveloping silence? It's not the type of silence when everything is still, nor is it a silence you experience when everyone is quiet. It's the type of silence that's loud, where it muffles out other sounds and makes you feel like you're underwater. It's the kind that one might experience after drinking an exorbitant amount of alcohol. Everything just becomes slower and more drawn out and all the background noises intertwine with one another and sort of fade. You can still hear it all, but it seems like instead of going in through your ears and processing in your mind, it just kind of starts sinking into the back of your skull and levitates in some deep hole in your head. You feel like you're watching everything from outside your body; almost dream-like. But that's how living is for me on a day-to-day basis.

Do you know how hard it is trying to keep track of everything? Of things to do, when to do them, and where they need to be done? How frusterating it is when you don't remember important details or conversations because at the time they were happening everything was so distant and faded? It was too hard to reach out and hang on to them. It's like when you're trying so hard to recapture a moment and you search through all your memory banks until you find what you need. Well I have to do that every day -- even for simple things. I've developed a technique along the way where I try to record events, and I constantly play them back to myself until i truly do remember them. You think night time is a time to rest... HA! That's when I play back all the movies of the day. Sometimes I'll fall asleep crying and other times I'll laugh myself to sleep. It's actually very annoying. I can't remember the last time I fell right to sleep -- I envy those who can.

What really upsets me though, are you quacks that run around in long, white jackets and call yourselves doctors. Hah! I'll show you a doctor.... I know what will make me better and it isn't all the chemically enhanced pills you want to put me on. Put me in a flower-filled pasture where i can dance with the butterflies and sing with the wind. Let me walk along the shore with the ocean waves nipping at my feet like an excited puppy. I'll skip over driftwood and soggy seaweed, and pick up a few shells I find particularly beautiful. I might even save one for you. I will look out to the horizon and see no beginning or no end. I will stare at my ripply reflection in the frothy water and see who I am -- not the person you want me to be. It may look a bit distorted but at least it's real.

I hope this is what you wanted? You asked me how I was feeling today and this is what you get. I really like all those candies in that crystal dish on your desk. To be honest, it kind of reminds me of myself. It's one body holding a whole bunch of different people. Why are you looking at me like that? As if you didn't already know. I'd like to have one of those candies now, to help get rid of the bad taste you just left in my mouth. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it -- candy could be the best medicine there is. It's certainly helping me to forget about you for a while.

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2 Comments
LeBrozLeBrozabout 17 years ago
~~

Well now, that was an interesting though meandering prose piece.

My Erotic TaleMy Erotic Taleover 19 years ago
candy?

oh my...

princess...is this free style?

or speak your mind...?

I liked the waves on feet like puppy dogs...

hehehe

very deep poetry...

thats okay I brought a shovel...

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