Allistair Putvain, who's good at chemistry,
Plays with fire but doesn't like girls yet,
And suddenly loves political science.
He'll discuss all that with Mother after
His last semester at Haverford ends
Who by then will summon Howard
To mull it over with a manhattan.
He wants to be senator, told her so,
But doesn't want to put his pants on
The same way other men have to do it,
Metaphorically speaking, of course.
But pimping for His Honorable Stewart,
Metaphorically speaking, of course,
Mother's congressional subterfuge,
And cocktails parties in the Hamptons,
Whenever he learns to drink should do it.
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