dedication

My mum

when my dad up and left us
you sat beside my bed and never made a fuss
you;d roll around the floor all day and night
shivering and shaking trying hard to fight

this disease controlled you
you never even thought to sue
epilepsy ruined your life
my dad said it made you a rubbish wife

i know none of that's right
i know he raped you day and night
I'm glad i was only young
or he;d be lying in a heap of dung.

i cry when you cry
i try and i try
with all my heart
but i know I'm not smart

every day you grow weaker
filling up that massive beaker
just to take those stupid pills
not wanting to fill you will

you'd do anything for me if you could
even give me your last quid
i want so badly for this to end
the talk of dieing is driving me round the bend

I love you dearly
i want you near me
i know am loosing you slowly every day
but you will go out with a bang your way

My mum means the world to me
that's plain to see
my brother and me love her
but no we will loose her

sitting in my room while you sleeping
my eyes fill with water crying
not of sadness or loss
but of love and joy and uttermost
love