Dementia Serenade

My best friend
   has gone away
my political foil went with him
my fellow adventurer
   doesn’t go beyond the driveway now
my game mate doesn’t remember the rules
the man who taught me to love jazz
   doesn’t hear the music now
the man who shared everything with me
   shares nothing now

The father of my children
   has gone away
doesn’t celebrate their success
doesn’t take credit for the way they’ve gone forth
   with love, with wisdom, with honor
doesn’t know his grandchildren
   doesn’t care

My lover
   has gone away
How do I fill the emptiness
without a chest to rest my weary head against
without the soft rise and fall of his breaths
without a heartbeat to match mine to
with no one to dry my tears
with no one to stoke the embers in my belly
   and no one to quench the fire after
   with lips, with fingers, with tongue, with cock
my fingers don’t fill that emptiness
   don’t work the magic that his tongue used to
I’ve been left with a loveless viagra’d phantom

Like the person who sits on my couch
who sleeps in my bed
who eats the food I place before him
   or not
who speaks in riddles
who angers because I cannot understand
this stranger who looks like
   my best friend, my lover
   gone away