Denial

I am not in denial
simply California
a framework for paradox
where the organic produce
shines through an SUV haze

What better place
to ponder life's contradictions
where arrival sometimes seems
desertion and loyalty
becomes betrayal
cowardice morphs into bravery

as truth becomes blurred by need
loss is transformed into gain
yet emptiness still fills one's heart
despite trying to wash it clean
with a flood of tears

Three thousand miles
between two realities
I carry one in each hand
which one I open depends
where I think I'm headed