Fear

In a crowded room, I'm alone.
Surrounded, yet inside myself.
The cold floor beneath me,
As I awake in the corner again.

Hands tremble, voices echo,
Every moment frightfully relived.
Trying to protect the smaller and weak,
Never doing enough.

Nowhere to go, no way out,
Can't let anyone know.
Too much worry for everyone else,
I can't be selfish.

Young eyes look upon me,
Asking for a guiding hand.
I take his trusting hand in mine,
No one will hurt him again.

The tears won't fall,
No matter what happens.
I will not give that satisfaction,
Will I ever cry again?

Desperately wanting to let it go,
Not knowing how.
Afraid of what will happen if I start,
What if it never ends?

Sleepless nights, forgotten days.
Will I ever be enough?
He deserves so much more,
My complete honesty.