- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Finally beside you.
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always behind you
trailing
falling behind
glancing up
only to find I needed to run
always trying to keep up
stumbling in your wake
in everything you'd
been there,
done that,
my life was full of
frustration
despair
anguish
and then
I stopped
just stood there
and let you walk on
alone
it's then you turned
and held out your hand
let my fingers be entwined
within yours
and together
we carried on.
© 12th, Feb, 2004
- COMMENTS
LeBrozabout 16 years agoThis poem was mentioned in the Archival Review thread, in a picking through Lit's archive of over 39,000 poems.
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sandspikeabout 20 years agoI just kept on walking. Not what you were looking for
but my latest example of forgetting there is no "i" in
team. You have a good poem here. It is simple yet
carries a weight of truth.
Angelineabout 20 years agoI like what this poem has to say and that it says it in such a simple, straightforwatd way. :)
I think you could really strengthen it by reformatting some so that the look of the words reflect the content of the poem. I'd run the lines where you describe feeling behind, unable to keep up actually behind the ones that describe the other person as being ahead (i.e., indent those). Then at the end they could have the same margin. Just an idea, but it could give this piece real visual impact. It's good either way, though!
