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Click hereForbear the silvered grass
Anchored deep in damp, red earth
Its rolling wave.
For I see my dead husband’s hair
Swaying in this same breeze.
and surprising, and tragic all at the same time. This is an absolutely perfect piece, in my opinion, with not a word out of place. It felt to me like a little section of some old Irish ballad. Just beautiful.
There's a lot going on in spite of how short it is. It has almost an elegaic feel, but also gothic, kind of creepy overtones. And there's something in the comparison of grass and hair and that damp red earth that made the "Full fathoms deep my father lies..." speech (from The Tempest?) pop into my head. Technically it's very, very good though I almost wish there were more. I feel as if you gave us only a peek at a tantalising story.
Your poem has been recommended in the New Poems Review thread on Literotica's Poetry Feedback and Discussion forum. Thank you much for the read! :-) ~Ange