Note: You can change font size, font face, and turn on dark mode by clicking the "A" icon tab in the Story Info Box.
You can temporarily switch back to a Classic Literotica® experience during our ongoing public Beta testing. Please consider leaving feedback on issues you experience or suggest improvements.
Click hereI want to fuck.
Not a pretty piece of poetry,
but real,
a small chunk of reality
splintered off from
the fabric of mundane
Everyday.
I am not a nice girl.
I want to use you to
get myself off and then
send you home
with nothing but a
a taste of pussy
and the need to brush
your teeth.
It had better be good too.
Skittles_lm 3-10-07
Like he said, fucking great. Actually while I enjoyed this very much, I do think Vamps suggestions would go toward making it even better. Still it is fucking great.
i think its fuckin' great. perfect fuck poem. but my opinion is not too highly valued, most probably.
(the whateva was in referance to the other pc's.)
Good effort
The imagery is solid and you've taken the reader to where you want them to go.
But I think this could be improved.
I would delete the line 'Everyday'
It didn't seem to fit everything that came before it
I'd clean up this stanza like follows
ending a line with the word 'of' is the equivalent of a roadblock to the reader and interrupts the flow of images already received. There is unnecessary hesistation.
Consider this revision:
I want to use you
to get myself off
and then send you
home
Still, good effort here
'fuck' is the wrong title and it should have been 'eat my pussy. It could have been a great little poem but pardon the pun, I think you fucked up.