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Click heremy spine twists as I roll beneath
your claws and our veins spill out
the darkness and the capacity for
love that pumps through my arms my hands
your extremities and
bursts
until we are slick with it naked
and laughing we paint our future
in the air with animated fingers
vivid visions of perfection and twisted
absurdity cum laude
we carry our youth and our vigor
under the blackness and in the blackness
and our strength comes when we twist together
our resilient strings like wine and
water to make something whole and animal
breathing heavily in your ear in my lungs
in our heart
really a pleasure to read an erotic poem that doesn't wack me over the head with overly graphic language, but instead relies on poetic devices (phrasings, imagery and metaphor) to carry the theme. I agree with Harry though that you could tinker and switch up some of the line breaks to make it even better. Just my opinion and an enjoyable read. 5ed.