I Dare You

Always planned ahead
I looked
And I felt absent in your life

You kept saying you needed me
And I kept saying the same
But you didn't seem to see it
Until you also felt the sting

I was trying as hard as I could
To make myself a safe place
To take care of myself
Because you would not

You made small gestures
And thought them grand
And while I appreciated the tokens of love and help
It was a tiny drop in the bucket
Already dry again

You have left me on my own
To my own devices to keep myself afloat
And when I had to choose
To sink or swim
You were angry that I chose to swim

The ocean tried to swallow me
But I clawed my way above the waves
And not only did I survive
I breaches the water and flew high

I spread strong wings
And when you called from the shore
It was a battle within me
Each time

I was free, forced to be so
By your lack of bondage
But by the same token, I had free will

And with that will
I gave you the greatest gift
That you would never realize I had given to you

I gave you my ability to have a choice
I gave you my ability to laugh and cry
I gave you my love and sorrow
And you bend beneath the weight of it

It is not only my own sorrows I carry
But all those hurts that others confide
All those bits of pain and fury
Loss and tragedy, joy and laughter

I am a gateway to the soul
A silent shoulder to cry on
A listener who says nothing back

Maybe it's not a stronger chain you need
But something delicate beyond delicate
A thread of lightest laughter, and most tender love

Dare you create such a thing?