Illuminated

In the morning, the officers told me to go to the mountains. I saw the goddess walking purposefully in the fog, wearing blue veils that seemed to glow. I pursued her, certain that she had a message for me. When I turned away for a moment, she vanished into the woods.

Walking down a hill above a placid lake, I passed below a towering wooden cross caked with bird droppings. Near the shore were two priests dressed in orange. I asked them about the goddess. One smiled and gave me many details. The other sat silently with far away eyes. In the confusion, I did not know which path to continue on.

For hours I wandered aimlessly in the primeval forest. I could sense hidden birds quietly watching me. In a clearing, I came upon an abandoned totem pole. The large eyes on the spirits' faces accentuated their expressions of power and anger. Feeling a mystical presence, I knelt, as if before an altar, until I heard a shaman in the distance whispering that no gods were present.

A renegade band of wasps buzzed around my thoughts. I wondered what had happened to the teacher who had taught me about the dead angels. Were her stories alive?

Was I seeking a story?

At the waterfall, a raven gave me a stolen rainbow. When I thanked him, he flew away. Sitting among the white flowers beneath the mist was a butterfly saying its prayers through a spider's web to the sky.

By mid afternoon, I was moving down the banks of the river. I was hungry. I found the grizzly bear feeding on a large run of fish heading upstream. I stared with increasing awe as the great beast romped through the water with amazing agility, capturing his prey with arrogant ease. Suddenly, he stopped and looked at me. I could see my tattered, frozen figure mirrored in his eyes. Just then, a cackling blackbird fluttered in front of the bear, screeching loudly in a shrill tone which set him back on his haunches.

I continued my journey, following the river to the end, where it emptied into the ocean. I walked the beach as the setting sun lit the horizon with brilliant colors; staining the surrounding black clouds with streaks of bloodied scarlet and iridescent violet. The waves galloping to the shore took on pink and bluish hues which transformed into a milky white as the surf reached its final limit. On a line leading into the sun was a long carpet of radiant red light. An eagle flew low above the illuminated path until its dark form was silhouetted against the glowing sphere. Inevitably (against my dying hopes), it diverted, flying off to the east without purpose or meaning. I laughed and cried with an enlightened disappointment as I trudged along the sand toward my destination.

In the evening, I laid on the dunes, ready for sleep. I looked up at the clear night sky and drew in imaginary lines on ancient constellations. As my eyes closed, I dissolved into the black emptiness between the bright stars.