In the Shadows

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I am the one who waits, in the shadows, a step behind
Always near, waiting patiently, for you to need me.
I am there to catch you should you fall and hold you until you rise again.
I am there to cheer your accomplishments and bear your frustrations.

Always near, waiting patiently, for you to need me.
I am the protector of secrets and the fire of your passion.
The nurturer, the encourager, the one to slake your thirst and quench your lust.
Never asking for praise. Made whole by your declaration of love.

I am the protector of your secrets and the fire of your passion.
I was wandering in the dark until that fire lit my way.
Since that moment I have never felts so satisfied and safe.

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tazz317tazz317about 11 years ago
SOME CAll ME A GUARDIAN

other from the other side. TK U MLJ LV NV

DesejoDesejoabout 11 years ago

I see from your Bio that you are new here and exploring new creative outlets. I like to try to leave constructive feedback, but in the end poetry is personal (duh) and you can take them or leave them as you please. I like the title of this, and the way which you have worked the idea of shadow and light into the poem - starting with shadows and ending with a fire lighting the dark. I think the theme of silent support (often unrecognized) is also good. To make this poem stronger, I would suggest trimming out some of the words, and trying to find uncommon ways of expressing the rest of it instead of the usual way. For example, the first stanza, reworked might become,

I wait, in the shadows/nearby, patient, I wait/to catch your arm when fall when you fall /cheer your victories from the sidelines

Just an example - but even in that you can start to see other associations. Mothers do this to protect their children's first steps. Cheering at football games...etc. which may or may not be what you want.

Anyway, I hope this is helpful in some way and to read you again.

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