It hurts when I punch my balls

You can tell by the title
That I might have a screw loose
Why would any guy partake in this
Very odd kind of abuse?

Well, maybe I wanted to experiment
Maybe I wanted to find out
My tolerance of pain
Or hear how loud I can shout.

Yes, its stupid
Especially in a poem as this
Where I could be drunk
And hitting my sack might be bliss.

Who knows how hard a fist can hit
An open palm might sting as well
My balls turned different shades
Violet, red and liberty bell.

I might have killed my sperm
A murderer like a cult gone wrong
There is also damage to my member
Which is now tic tac long.

These lines make less and less sense
As I type the my words
Just as strange a tale
As Alfred Hitchcock's Birds.

I remember the wings flapping
The beaks pecking as people ran
Now my penis is all pecked out
The wings have the imprint of my hand

Here now I sit in throbbing pain
Regretting my kamikazi attack
I will remember this next time
I have an urge to crunch my sack

Okay I am done, time to wrap it up
And I am not talking about this
I am referring to my nuts
I need bandages now before I piss.