Laughing Illusions

Laughing, taunting, voices there.
Faces in the mind, making you scared.
You try and you try
to dispel this pain,
but it won't leave..
implanted in the brain..
It sometimes gets to much to bear,
You feel like screaming, pulling out your hair.
Reach for drugs but you can't find them,
call out for friends and they're not there.
No one to run to, nothing to kill this feeling.
Pray to God, head down, body kneeling.
Nothing helps,
nothing calms.
Blood red face,
sweaty palms.
The razor looks so sweet to see,
maybe the noose or the guillotine.
All in all, it's a living hell,
and you can't remember exactly when you fell.
It's live or die, laugh or cry,
pain or pleasure,
nothing can measure.
Helpless sobs inside, outside a smile.
Just lay down and die for a while.
Tears roll down, whether they're seen or not.
How did it feel to be sane? Maybe you forgot.
It was nice, I think, didn't want to blink.
Had a reason to get up and live all day,
praised for all you do and say..
Life was alright before you lost your mind,
could be that you'll get it back, in time.
Wouldn't it be nice? No pain or strife.
A REAL smile on your face,
REAL happiness in your heart...
But right now, it's all about falling apart....