Let it Slip

i once held that love in my hands...only to let it slip away into the dark corners of my mind. I never once thought it was the real deal...but only if i looked deeper i could have found what it is that i held deep within me. Surrounded by terror and saddness i never once thought it could happen to me. i never once thought i could be so lucky as to have that love everyone seems to torment me about. I never once realized i had that love...but i let it slip away like the rest of my life. Comforting words have yet to help my sorrow...and i dont think they will. what i need is closure from existance...from...her. I cant help but look back into my past and see the things that we had gone through and talked about. I was her first and how nice that was...to be first instead of dead last...but in the end i turned out to be dead last only i didnt realize it up until now. i was merly a phase within her time to explore...within her time to find out what she wanted and who she wanted...and apparently it was not me.

I do not think she knew what i was capable of...or what it is i am like...i was never given the chance to show her...it was dismissed before it ever begun. Only a passing being in her time warp...only an image left to fade away...only me left alone in the dark corners of the world i call love...or as i should call it LIFE. My closure is now...the dark corner i call love has faded away her image...but now to find its true occupant...if only my corner worked like that. But i have moved passed the past...and on to the future.

I continue to hide behind my walls...my barriers...my fort.

Never given a chance.

Never shown what i have to offer.

Never realized what i should have done.

Never known what i was leaving behind.