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Click hereYou gave me Life
supplied me with your milk
provided shelter from harm
offered unconditional love
My teacher and friend
always there for me
never expecting a reward
My beautiful Queen
after all you have given
dare I ask of you more?
I long to kiss not just your cheek
to once again suckle at your breasts
a joy long since forgotten
but now it's time for your gifts
I will present to you all that I have
My love, My body, My virginity
I’ve saved myself for you Mother
waited decades to give you My seed
let our Love create a new Life
and start the cycle again
I felt that it was missing some punctuation. There's something else - it feels uneven. There are points at which it flows, but it seems to jump.