Limerick Girl

A well brought up girl named Colleen
Had a passion for Father O’Keene.
She’d kneel to his god
And imagine his rod
In her mouth, while she wanked off the Dean

But O’Keene, sure, was not to be swayed
From his vows by a frisky young maid.
The good man would not sin
With a pretty virgin;
T’was the choirboys he usually laid.

One Christmas day it came to pass
That Colleen, being top of her class,
At last cornered the priest
Celebrating the feast
And begged him to bugger her arse.

‘Behave yourself girl!’ cried O’Keene,
‘Your lasciviousness is obscene.
‘But, thank God, you’re in luck;
‘Father Ted likes a fuck –
‘As long as you’re over eighteen!’

O’Keene was not at all in the wrong
Colleen gasped at the sight of Ted’s dong
It was four inches thick
And as hard as a brick,
As he shoved his hand inside her thong.

Colleen knew she was quite unlike some
Frigid girls; her cunt started to thrum,
As the curate from Louth
Withdrew from her mouth
And splattered her visage with come.

So come all you young maidens who stray
From the path of the righteous way.
Find a curate or vicar
Whose penis is thicker,
Then hold your cunt open – and PRAY.