Maelstrom

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90 words
4.8
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Lost in sensual thought,
waves upon waves,
crashing at the cave,
frothy foam caught,
in silky golden strands,
fragrance bitter sweet,
as saline sea,
that swirling vortex.

"Nonsense" says she,
gazing at the cave,
swollen by rising tide,
flooding with passion,
"he's just an old sailor!"
he navigates well,
her passions of hell,
the maelstrom wet and wild.

"My old sailor,
my mouth more than words,
the mystery of my cave,
the pleasures of my cove,
my three docks,
your vessel finds home,
your only real estate?
My seasoned seaman."

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2 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 14 years ago
Yep, not many can handle the storm

We're just a bunch of university coeds that like your poems in prose. You're kind of like Tom Robins we are guessing. "Even Cowgirls Get the Blues."

EroticOrogenyEroticOrogenyover 14 years ago
Like the change over the stanzas

The first stanza is some detached/neutral and the sensuality comes in later.

Does every line need to end with a ',' ? It seems to work in most, but a couple lines would benefit from dropping the comma.