My Grandma: Forgotten Memories

I wish I could remember her -
The smell of vanilla against cotton sweaters,
A youthful smile playing across her lips,
Maybe chocolate chip cookie stains on her apron?

As time passed though
So did the clarity of my memories,
Lost in youth’s carelessness.

If only I had her beauty to cling to
A clearer memory
A sweet night at Kenora,
Playing cards
Is the memory real or imagined?

Instead all I can picture
Is sallow skin
Clinging loosely to a woman I no longer knew.

Tears unfettered pouring from my eyes
As she wondered who I was
Screams to help her –
Take her from the hospital
From her life.

A child’s memory
Clutching her cold hand one last time
Brushing angrily at the tears
Trying to be strong for my mother’s sake.

Happy her time had finally come,
Guilty for feeling that way.
My memories are lost
But the pain still lingers on…



This poem was heavily inspired not only by my Grandma Mawsie, but also by Syndra Lynn’s poem Grandma is a Goddess. Thank you both for inspiring me...