My Mistake

He came with tears
on a hot summer night
sitting on my mother’s mattress
confessing sins and consequences
that banned me from my childhood
home with a guy who did coke
and the girl he bruised up
the stink of liquor in the sink
wafting throughout the house

It was here that I held him in my arms
kissed his tiny head
and promised better days
while dodging punches
with a girlfriend who slept
in a car until her love passed out

It was here that I was promiscuous
in the eyes of all who knew me
jaws dropped, heads shaking
tongues clucking in disapproval
though I’d only taken one lover
and all the consequences
bundled beneath my heart

It was here that I dared to dream
and studied psychology
read Dr. Spock
and shocked all who thought they knew me
when I graduated from college
and bought a house on a lake
became a proper librarian
and cherished my mistake