My New Throne

I look around and I can see the splendid home surrounding me.
I feel like Archie Bunker as I view the place from my new chair.
My ass is on the leather seat; the ottoman supports my feet.
I wonder if there is a man as nicely seated anywhere.

Old Archie Bunker used to be a famous bigot on TV.
I don’t believe that I am like him, save in one specific way.
For, just like Arch, I don’t permit another soul to come and sit
Upon the chair that I have claimed and that I sit on ev’ry day.

Sometimes I park there and peruse a book or maybe read the news.
Or gaze upon a show that flickers on the giant TV set.
I think that when I go to meet my maker, I will take this seat
Along with me as written in my final will and testament.