On a Plastic Bottle of Love

That’s right, we’ve finally done it!

Thanks to recent technological breakthroughs,
 we’ve managed to get love in a bottle!
You don’t need to deal with unsightly significant others anymore!
You can get all the power of love without the unpleasant side effects of
fear, regret, pain and hope.

Don’t be fooled by imitators. There’s only one love in a bottle.
Previous attempts at love in a bottle have met with mixed results
Some needed another person to be there, but when you woke up the next morning, the effects quickly wore off.
Some had you spend all your money, only to find the bottle empty.
Some had you inserting the bottle, but, you know, it never felt quite the same

Now you don’t need to worry about any of that.
Market research has shown our formula is perfect and doesn’t require any effort.
Just open the bottle and enjoy!

Also, try some of our other flavors
Warm Fuzzies
Spicy Nights
Calm ‘n’ Bliss
Diet Love (with Sucrolove)


Nurturition Facts

Serving Size… You’ll need more
Calories… It’s love! Who cares?
Total Fat… Don't you watch TV? There's no fat with love
Sugars… No pet names needed

Ingredients
Artificial flavors, MSG, soy, red 40