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It never really mattered anyway.
I keep saying that
and I say that it's okay.
but is it really?
I am in love with a memory.
but in my dreams, he loves me too.
I had such a wonderful night.
and then it was day.
The jazz, the chalk, the tazers.
and then he was gone.
sitting til my butt went numb.
I only wanted some finality.
He said he couldn't come.
I tried too hard.
I gave in so quickly.
I didn't even try.
I wanted to make him hurt.
I gave him my forever.
I wanted something more.
he didn't have a clue.
And when the bottle was empty
I poured it out
he started shouting about
I couldn't hear a thing
stuff about how he cared.
did I mention IT's blue?
I ignored the signs.
neon-signed above his head.
I walked away.
even as he called my name.
I think it's over.
