Portal to the Vixen Planet

The Portal to the Vixen Planet

Not much faster than a herd of turtles,
a spotlight climbed in to the night sky.
I argued it was not a portal to the vixen planet
but they wouldn't speak of it,
they just got the ladder and tried to climb up to the moon.

The trampoline was the second trial
after the 26 feet didn't make it.
They called for the local VFD for a fire truck ladder
but they would not come,
they said they had a pussy tree'd.
I have to admit the moon seemed a bit brighter
hanging over the tops of trees, inviting.

Well, Bud Waswiser got the bright idea
to take a canon from the Civil War Historical Park
and shoot old Jim Bob to this portal
holding a rope to throw down to the rest of us.
I promise I didn't even volunteer for that honor,
I think Jim Bob was drafted, anyway.

The canon was fetched with Jill's 4 wheel drive
and Jim Bob sank into the hole of this firing device
and Bud hollered, "Wait," well everybody stopped.
"Raise the canon, the dang portal is moving."
Well, that meant raising the canon nearly straight into the air.
They lit the fuse and it sizzled with sparks that spew sounds like a pit of vipers being chased by a lit bic lighter.

The puff of smoke bellowed way before the boom,
if Jim Bob was shot out, it was faster than a fully clothed eye.
But he wasn't in that canon we checked.
He must have went straight through the hole in the sky,
the portal to the vixen planet, lucky dog!