push

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52 words
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it's over
abundance of will waning
weightless tug of worth
push pinning hopes
pining away
pulling - back and forth
through days free
falling through the wisp
per wants born naked
in dark nested need
full, filling the still life
less touch and go; story
dying before our berth

~ ~ ~

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  • COMMENTS
7 Comments
AmyfriendAmyfriendabout 17 years ago
Short, sweet....

and incredibly good.

sacksackover 17 years ago
an astonishingly good example....

of "less is more!"

Awful ArthurAwful Arthurover 17 years ago
Deep

So deep that it may be bottomless. I found something new in each line every time I read it over again. At first, I thought that I was finding unintended meanings and effects but upon further readings, I think not--I'm finding very little of all that is there. I was particularly struck by the lines, "weightless tug of worth" and "dying before our berth" and the unjoined "wisp per."

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
I will be coming back to this one.

I would call it more mercury than lead--shifting sinuously from meaning to meaning, depending on the temperature of the reader.

Belle_RingerBelle_Ringeralmost 18 years ago
I agree with Liar

This is incredibly compact, dense I would even call it. I will have to read it many times to realize all I want in it.

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